Interested in Supporting a Vegan Filmmaker?

Then check THIS out.

Apparently Ryan Vance is a vegan filmmaker (and a foxy vegan filmmaker, at that) who is trying to raise some money to complete a romantic comedy he wrote called "Vegan Love."



Apparently, you can pledge some moolah on his website if you'd like, and I guess how it works is if he manages to raise $2800, then he will accept your monetary contribution. However, if he doesn't meet his goal, you won't be out a single dime.

Again:

His Fundraiser Page

His blog

Oh, and if by chance he actually turns out to be that King of Spain that's always emailing me and asking me to send him money overseas, I take no responsibility. If it's any reassurance, I'm pretty certain that, in the picture above, he's just emphasizing the fact that he IS NOT, in fact, the King of Spain and WILL NOT steal all your money. Either that or he's holding an imaginary apple.

Curried Lentils With Sweet Potatoes and Swiss Chard Kale

                                    from Smitten Kitchen

I am not in the wittiest of moods today, so in lieu of my usual stunning humor, I offer you a picture of Freddie Prinze and a really good (as in ohmygodyum), quick, and simple recipe that--as usual--looks like dookie. Or Freddie Prinze if Freddie Prinze happened to look like dookie. But Freddie Prinze could NEVER look like dookie because he is hot and has feathered hair.

Enjoy.



INGREDIENTS:

• 2 T. extra virgin olive oil


• 1 medium onion, chopped


• 4 garlic cloves, minced


• 1 1-inch piece fresh ginger root, peeled and grated (or I used about 1/2 t. powdered ginger)


• 1 1/2 t. garam masala


• 1 1/2 t. curry powder


• 1 jalapeno pepper, seeded if desired, then minced


• 4 to 5 c. vegetable broth as needed


• 2 lbs. orange-fleshed sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into 1/2-inch cubes (about 4 c.)


• 1-1/2 c.s dried lentils


• 1 bay leaf


• 1 pound Swiss chard, center ribs removed, leaves thinly sliced (or you can sub in kale with really good results)


• salt, to taste


• 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper


• 1/3 c. chopped fresh cilantro


• Finely grated zest of 1 lime


• Juice of 1/2 lime


Optional:


• 1/3 cup finely chopped tamari almonds, for garnish (optional), available in health food stores


• 1/4 cup chopped scallions, for garnish

DIRECTIONS

In large saucepan, heat oil over medium heat. Add onion and saute until translucent, 5 to 7 minutes. Add garlic, ginger, garam masala, curry powder and jalapeno. Cook, stirring, for 1 minute.

Stir in 4 cups broth, sweet potatoes, lentils and bay leaf. Increase heat to high and bring to a boil; reduce heat to medium, partially cover, and simmer for 25 minutes. (If lentils seem dry, add up to 1 cup stock, as needed.) Stir in chard and salt and pepper, and continue cooking until lentils are tender and chard is cooked, about 30 to 45 minutes total.

Just before serving, stir in cilantro, lime zest and juice. Spoon into a large, shallow serving dish. Garnish with almonds if desired and scallions.

Yield: 8 to 10 side-dish servings; 6 main-course servings. (I actually got 3-4 large lunch-portions out of this.)

(Original recipe from Smitten Kitchen)

Coagulation Celebration: Cheesey Bean and Cheese Enchiladas

                                    from Ommnomnom & VegWeb


Certain foods just DON'T hold together well the first day. They are unphotogenic. They just sort of blorp themselves all over your plate. They look slippery and flaccid. But then, second day: PERFECT CONSISTENCY. The main culprits seem to be lasagna and enchilada dishes.

Today's recipe is a case in point.

After it was all done cooking, I let it sit for a while in the hope that some coagulation might take place. But when I scooped the first couple enchiladas out, it was like enchilada soup.

And then Tuesday, I had leftovers, and they were perfectly plump and beany. Go figure.

Anyways, this is a nice solid recipe. I *WILL* say, however, that if I make these again, I'll probably adjust the following:

Sub in one can of sweet corn for one of the cans of beans--I mean, sweet jesus, if you lit a match around me or N-A Sunday night, we might've combusted. And honestly, beans are delightful and all, but when you got beans beans beans, you need something sweet to counterbalance. And corn would no doubt do the trick.

Either track down some low-sodium enchilada sauce or sub in one jar of salsa for one of the cans--This was WAY too salty for my taste. And I am saying this as someone who salts the shit out of EVERYTHING, including ketchup.

And finally: I recommend serving this over a small bed of lettuce. It will help counterbalance the saltiness and make you feel at least SLIGHTLY healthier than you would otherwise after eating this dish.

All that being said and done: This is one of those recipes that's a good framework for experimentation.

So get thee to an oven and start experimenting!

INGREDIENTS:

• 1/2 c. flour


• 1/2 c. nutritional yeast


• Salt, to taste


• 1 t. garlic powder


• 2 c. water


• 1 t. mustard


• 4 T. margarine


• 10 small tortillas (or 8 large)


• 2 small cans enchilada sauce


• 3 cans beans (white kidney, pinto, black), drained

-or-


• 2 cans beans and 1 can corn, drained


• 2 medium onions, chopped (or 3 green onions, sliced)


• 1 can olives, chopped


• 1/4 c. chopped cilantro


• 1/2 c. salsa (optional)

DIRECTIONS

In medium-large saucepan, combine flour, nutritional yeast, salt and garlic powder. Add water and mix thoroughly. Heat on medium heat until bubbling and thick. Remove from heat and add mustard and margarine.

Set aside 1/2 cup of cheese sauce in separate container. Add onion, beans, olives, cilantro and salsa to sauce. Mix it up.

Pour a 1/2 cup of enchilada sauce in the bottom of a 9×13 pan. Place a tortilla in pan and cover in enchilada sauce. Spoon in filling. Roll and push to one end of pan. Continue until all tortillas filled.

Pour the rest of the enchilada sauce on top and then spread reserved cheese sauce on as last step.

Bake at 350 until brown, 30-45 minutes.

Serves: 6-8

(Recipe posted at Ommnomnom)

Just Some Things

The other day, I read in VegNews that Wonderbread is vegan. Yes, Wonderbread is probably THE crappiest bread EVER. I've seen ducks choke on it because as soon as you add saliva to the mix, it basically turns into glue. But fuck if it isn't nice to have an easily accessible shit-bread that I can pick up last-minute at the grocery store if I'm hard up.



My roof-garden (basically a series of window-pots that have been doing SURPRISINGLY well out on my roof) is dwindling as autumn starts creeping up on us. My roma tomato plant has just two more tomatoes left before it kicks the bucket. My jalapeno plant has one more jalapeno desperately hanging in there. My basil suddenly got wilty the other day and hasn't recovered. My parsley has pretty much been the same flaccid size all summer. And my flowers (african daisies and zinnias) are shuddering and retreating against the chilly mornings. Despite all that, I've gotta say: I ADORE the fall and look forward to doing lots of snuggling with N-A and whipping up some nice hearty soups and stews.

But for nostalgia's sake, I share with you the tail-end of my summer bounty.

These are the (pitifully tiny but nonetheless DELISH) roma tomatoes that my tomato-plant birthed PLUS a red jalapeno from my jalapeno plant:




This is the Super Quick Basil Cream Pasta I whipped up last week, topped with fresh roma tomatoes and basil from my roof-pots:



This is Zooey coming to terms with the fact that the creeper plant from the trellis down below has for some reason decided this summer to take over the edge of my roof. Relatively nice for me though, as it's been acting like a kind of natural fence to keep her from jumping (and jump she does, believe me). Nonetheless, she got stung in the eye once because of it, so I think she's holding a grudge. Despite that, she sure does look cute amidst the green...



And finally, when we had the short bout of cool days the week I got back from Michfest, I whipped up some reruns for me and N-A. I feature them below, only because they're hotgoddamnsexy. If I were like brussel sprouts or green beans, I'd totally do them.




(Seitan-Shallots Marsala)


(Lemony Roasted Potatoes)

The Vegan's Hundred

Your wish is my command, bittersweet!

Apparently there is a lot I haven't eaten but nothing I wouldn't try at least once!

Your mission, should you choose to accept it:

1) Copy this list into your own blog, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Post a comment here once you’ve finished and link your post back to this one.
5) Pass it on!

1. Natto
2. Green Smoothie
3. Tofu Scramble
4. Haggis
5. Mangosteen
6. Creme brulee
7. Fondue
8. Marmite/Vegemite
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Nachos
12. Authentic soba noodles
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Taco from a street cart
16. Boba Tea
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Gyoza
20. Vanilla ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Ceviche
24. Rice and beans
25. Knish
26. Raw scotch bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Caviar
29. Baklava
30. Pate
31. Wasabi peas
32. Chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Mango lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Mulled cider
37. Scones with buttery spread and jam
38. Vodka jelly
39. Gumbo
40. Fast food french fries
41. Raw Brownies
42. Fresh Garbanzo Beans
43. Dahl
44. Homemade Soymilk
45. Wine from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more (as long as I wasn't paying for it. =)
46. Stroopwafle
47. Samosas
48. Vegetable Sushi
49. Glazed doughnut
50. Seaweed
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Tofurkey
54. Sheese
55. Cotton candy
56. Gnocchi
57. Piña colada
58. Birch beer
59. Scrapple
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Soy curls
63. Chickpea cutlets
64. Curry
65. Durian
66. Homemade Sausages
67. Churros, elephant ears, or funnel cake
68. Smoked tofu
69. Fried plantain
70. Mochi
71. Gazpacho
72. Warm chocolate chip cookies
73. Absinthe
74. Corn on the cob
75. Whipped cream, straight from the can
76. Pomegranate
77. Fauxstess Cupcake
78. Mashed potatoes with gravy
79. Jerky
80. Croissants
81. French onion soup
82. Savory crepes
83. Tings
84. A meal at Candle 79
85. Moussaka
86. Sprouted grains or seeds
87. Macaroni and “cheese”
88. Flowers
89. Matzoh ball soup
90. White chocolate
91. Seitan
92. Kimchi
93. Butterscotch chips
94. Yellow watermelon
95. Chili with chocolate
96. Bagel and Tofutti
97. Potato milk
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Raw cookie dough

A Rant Like No Other Rant Ranted by This Ranter

Ok. Most of you have been reading this blog long enough to know me (or my web-persona at least) fairly well. You know I'm not a dick (except tongue in cheek), and you know I don't randomly diss on people (unless they're leaving assholey comments on the bumper of my car). But the other day, I picked up the newest issue of VegNews and settled into reading the article titled "Faux Meat Revolution" (Sept./Oct. 2008). Along the margins of this article, they've collected quotes from various people across the country giving their two cents about the faux-meat debate. And as I was reading them, I stumbled across the following quote, and, well, I just had to post it, as it is seriously, one of the STUPIDEST things I have ever read. Stupid enough that I am surprised that the VegNews even took the time to publish it. Because seriously, it's veg*ns that say THIS kind of shit that give veg*ns a bad name. It's comments like THIS that justifiably (and this is probably the only time I will say JUSTIFIABLY) make meat-eaters roll their eyes and think veg*ns a bunch of nutcases. It's quotes like this that make me actually blurt out to my cats, "Are you fucking kidding me???"

Readers: Are you prepared? Are you sitting down? Are you within five-feet of a stiff drink?

Here you go...

In criticism of faux-meat:

"Anyone who supplements too much with foods that are labeled "chicken, beef, or fish" isn't really vegetarian. The worst faux meats are those flavored in such a way that it might as well be meat. The best food for you is homemade food." --Johanna Woodbury (Brattleboro, VT)

Let's post this one more time in larger font, just so you don't miss a GODDAMN word of it:

"Anyone who supplements too much with foods that are labeled "chicken, beef, or fish" isn't really vegetarian. The worst faux meats are those flavored in such a way that it might as well be meat. The best food for you is homemade food." --Johanna Woodbury (Brattleboro, VT)

Now, I debated posting the person's name, on the off-chance that one day they'd be googling their name (like we all do) and stumble across this rant. But then I thought: no. That comment is SO fucktarded that I hope Johanna Woodbury (yes, YOU Johanna Woodbury) DOES in fact google her name and read this. Because (and really, I don't think much needs to be said here, because I think as soon as you read that, you will probably be like, *cartoon doubletake* WHAT?!?!?!, but I will say it anyways) vegetarianism is the active choice to give up the consumption of MEAT. Not the consumption of things that LOOK like meat (but aren't meat). Not the consumption of things that SMELL like meat (but aren't meat). Not things that TASTE like meat (but aren't meat). But MEAT. MEAT MEAT MEAT.

Who in the fuck actually believes that someone who eats too much faux meat ISN'T ACTUALLY A VEGETARIAN?!?!?!? Oh my god. Not to mention the fact that apparently Johanna Woodbury not only believes that vegetarians who eat fake-meat aren't really vegetarians, but she also seems to be implying that if you flavor something to TASTE like meat, then you might as well be biting into a big chunk of dead flesh. You accidentally seasoned that tofu in a way reminiscent of the perch you used to eat: YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST EAT THE PERCH. Eat a potato that just happens to be flavored with steak-seasonings: YOU ARE ESSENTIALLY EATING THE FUCKING STEAK!!! Order a veggie burger at your local veg-friendly restaurant that tastes UNCANNILY like the old-school cheeseburgers of your youth: YOU ARE BANISHED FROM THE LAND OF VEGETARIANISM!!!

How MOTHERF-ING SILLY does that sound???

I mean, seriously: I am hiding this magazine so that one of my meat-eating friends doesn't happen across this quote, because I think it may make their head explode. Not only is it holier than thou in that "Annoying Veg*n"-type way, but it's DOUBLY so, because it's dissing on people WHO ARE ON THE SAME PAGE AS HER!!! (Translation of her quote: You may be vegetarian, but I'm a BETTER vegetarian than you because I don't eat fake-meat. Motherf-ing bullshit.)

Oh my god. *shaking my head in continued disbelief*

Ugh. That quote just makes me so angry.

And yes, I admittedly have a fairly strong opinion about faux meats, and essentially it's this: "If its authenticity has a far better chance of convincing a diehard meat-eater to go veg, and if it's not (in any which way, shape, or form) causing any sort of suffering and/or wreaking zombie-like havoc on small towns, THEN WHY THE FUCK GO ON AND ON ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU DISLIKE IT?!? Just shut up and DON'T EAT IT. And, good god, stop frothing at the mouth about The Evils of Faux Meat to everyone else around you. I mean, I don't like brussel sprouts, but I don't feel the need to go ON AND ON AND ON to my fellow vegheads about "the ethical dilemma of eating brussel sprouts" ALL THE MOTHERF-ING TIME, right? And no doubt, mock meats aren't anything gourmet or *putting on snooty french voice* excquisitely culinary in nature. But, um, who said they were trying to be?" So yeah: I have strong opinions.

But quite honestly, I am putting all that aside in posting this, and not even taking issue with the faux-meat-haters at all when I say this... Regardless of whether this had been on the pro- or anti- faux-meat eating side, it seriously is one of THE dumbest things I've EVER heard.

Johanna Woodbury, I'm sure you're a very nice lady and all. And I'm sure you're a dedicated veg*n. But if you ever happen to be in Cleveland, you best be ready to rumble.

Spring Panzanella

                                    from Smitten Kitchen


I heart bread. I could eat nothing but bread all day without the slightest bit of angst for fruits or vegetables. And since we all know I harbor resentment against boring lettuce salads, the concept of panzanella (bread salad) BLOWS MY MOTHERF-ING MIND. I mean, a salad of bread: HOW COULD YOU NOT BE TOTALLY SMITTEN WITH THAT IDEA?!?!

So yeah, when I saw Vegan Dad mention this bread salad by Smitten Kitchen on his blog, I was like: Yeah, I'm making this. Immediately.

Plus, I heart leeks. And I heart asparagus. SO HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY GO WRONG WITH THIS RECIPE??

As I was making this salad, I got to thinking though. And I realized the following:

1. I think I'm sick of vinegar. Which is like the strangest thing ever. But it may be true.


2. I am looking forward to cooler weather. I can't wait to shelve the salad recipes, bust out the soup recipes, and start making heavy, warm, love-handle food already.


3. I think I am prejudiced against yeast. HOW TERRIBLE IS THAT?? Any time I read a bread recipe that calls for yeast, I'm all *muttering under my breath* Fuck that, motherfucker. (Not that this recipe CALLED for yeast, but somehow my brain went there anyways.) AND I'M NOT EVEN 100% SURE WHY! I think it may just be that I automatically KNOW it means kneading something for like 10 minutes, and that IRRITATES me. And yet, something in me really wants to like it. Mostly because it just seems so very Suzy Homemakery, you know?


4. And now that we're off topic: classism and veganism. That's a topic that I really would like to address on this blog someday soon.


5. Nutritional yeast: I just keep falling more and more in love. Just when I think I couldn't fall any harder, SLABBAM: right down the stairs.


6. So did you hear that they're coming out with a new 90210 show?? Not even kidding you.

Anyways, back to the bread salad. Despite my sudden angst over vinegar, I DID like this salad. Mostly because homemade croutons ROCK. I was a little bit flummoxed by the leeks (which Smitten Kitchen DID give a warning about) simply because they didn't stay intact AT ALL while cooking them. They still tasted fine, but they fell all apart. Which makes me think there has to be SOME sort of better way to cook these. But yeah, this recipe isn't anything too complex, but its medley of flavors works well. And also: bread. So it's worth checking out.

INGREDIENTS:

Croutons:


• 1/4 c. olive oil


• 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped


• 6 c. day-old bread, crust removed, cubed


• Salt and freshly ground black pepper



Vinaigrette:


• Half a red onion, finely diced


• 2 to 2-1/2 T. champagne or white wine vinegar (or I used 1.5 T. white vinegar + 1 T. white wine)


• Juice of half a lemon


• 1/4 c. olive oil


• 1/2 t. Dijon mustard



Salad:


• 4 large leeks


• Salt, to taste


• 1 pound asparagus


• 1 small can of white beans, rinsed and drained (or 1 1/2 c. cooked white beans)


• 1/2 T. nutritional yeast (optional)

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Mix the bread cubes with the garlic, olive oil, salt and pepper in a large bowl. Toss to coat well. Transfer bread to a baking sheet and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Bake stirring once or twice, until the croutons are crisp and lightly colored on the outside but still soft within, about 10 to 15 minutes. Set aside and let cool.

Mix the red onion with the vinegar and lemon juice in a small bowl and set aside for a few minutes before whisking in the remaining vinaigrette ingredients: olive oil and dijon. Set aside.

Cut off dark green tops of leeks and trim root ends. Halve each leek lengthwise to within 2 inches of root end. Rinse well under cold running water to wash away sand. Cover leeks with cold water in a 12-inch heavy skillet. Add salt and simmer leeks, uncovered, until tender, 15 to 20 minutes.

Without draining the cooking water (you will reuse it for the asparagus), transfer leeks to a bowl of ice and cold water to stop cooking, then pat the leeks dry with paper towels. Break off tough ends of asparagus and cook it in the boiling water until crisp-tender, no more than 3 minutes if they’re pencil-thin, more if your asparagus is thicker. Transfer it to another bowl of ice water, drain and pat it dry.

Cut the leeks and the asparagus each into 1-inch segments–the leeks will be especially slippery and prone to separating; hold firm and use a sharp knife! Place pieces in a large bowl and mix in beans and cooled croutons. Pour vinaigrette over and toss well. Season with salt and pepper. (I also sprinkled about 1/2 T. or so of nutritional yeast over it all--the original recipe calls for parmesan on the croutons, so I wanted to give it a hint of cheesiness without overdoing it.)

(Recipe from Smitten Kitchen)

Super Quick Tomato Basil Cream Pasta

                                    from VeganYumYum


Why is it that recipes that taste SO good somehow manage to look like baby vomit so often? *SIGH*

Actually, it just dawned on me that I've posted quite a few scatalogical recipes (mainly ones that look like shit and vomit) over these last couple years. Which is really quite disgusting. But which also explains all the weird google searches.

Case in point...



VOMITS:

Recent Fettucine Alfreda





Less recent Curried Split Pea Soup





Baby Vomit Syrup






FECES:

Chickpea Nuggets





Veganomicon Mole Sauce





Slow-Cooker Vegetable Vindaloo




This is making me think I really need to have a Scatology-themed Dinner Night. How gross (and thus, totally awesome) would THAT be?

Anyways, back to today's recipe. Last night I whipped up VeganYumYum's Super Quick Tomato Basil Cream Pasta. And I must admit: It was super. It was quick. It was tomato. It was basil. It was cream. And it was pasta. SCORE!

It also was really quite tasty. Alas, my pics aren't quite so pretty as hers, but nonetheless: good. I *DO* recommend throwing in at least a TAD bit of the optional wine. Gives it a depth and perkiness that is otherwise kind of missing. But yes, it is creamy and delish. And I plan on gorging on more tonight.

I've reposted her recipe with quantities doubled (so as to serve four). I also ended up using 4 slightly smaller tomatoes, which resulted in me having to use a bit more cashews and tomato paste. But I'm not going to reflect that below. It'll just be straight-up doubling.



INGREDIENTS:

• 2 large, ripe tomatos (4 cups roughly chopped, 3 cups blended)


• 1 c. raw cashews


• 2 T. tomato paste


• 1/2 c. water


• 4 T. olive oil


• 4-48 cloves garlic, minced, optional


• 1 lb. whole wheat spaghetti


• Salt, to taste


• 2-3 T. wine or water, optional


• 2-4 t. freshly cracked, coarse black pepper


• 1-2 large handfuls fresh basil leaves, chopped

DIRECTIONS

Put a large pot of salted water on to boil.
Core the tomatoes, then roughly chop them. Add them to your blender, seeds, skin and all. Add cashews, tomato paste, and water. Blend until very smooth.

Add olive oil to a large saute pan over medium-high heat. Add garlic and saute until golden, being careful not to burn. Once water is boiling, add pasta. Pour sauce from the blender into the saute pan and bring to a simmer. Add salt and let cook for 4-5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

If desired add wine/water to thin out the sauce. Taste and season more if necessary. Let simmer until pasta is finished cooking. Once pasta is cooked, drain. Add pasta to the saute pan with black pepper and freshly chopped basil leaves. Toss to coat. Serve immediately, garnishing with more pepper and basil.

Serves 4-6.

(Recipe from VeganYumYum)

This Week in "The Most Bizarre Google Searches by Which People Stumble Across This Blog"

What can we learn from this week's searches? That there is something to be said about being able to actually spell.

• at least i'm not a vegetarian


• USING VAGAN FINGER


• vegetarian resturans cleavland


• vegan bbq recipes suck


• mole porn [TWICE this search has popped up]


• vegan shit smells


• red pepper makes me shit


• shit shorts


• shit international


• corn shit


• pouring water on your pussy


• kidney treatment apple moot


• onions make me shit


• sexy strawberry and whip cream pics

(For past editions, click HERE)

Yo Mama Was an Avocado!

So as you all know, I was a bit weirded out by the existence of the giant fruit-tasting avocado. Thankfully I am super-awesome-brilliant-foxy-hot-sexy (the latter three adjectives may not be relevant to this tale, but I just thought they should be pointed out so that you didn't accidentally overlook those facts), so I had the thought to perhaps balance out the fruitiness of the avocado by turning it into a pasta sauce. And voila. It worked. I have no specific measurements and no specific recipe. I mostly just wanted to brag. But I can at least tell you what I did and what I put.

One of those large crazy-ass avocados, mashed. A bit of plain soy milk. Some vegan margarine (which I think it could've done without since avocados are already fattening as fuck, but I was gearing it off of another recipe that used it). Some noodles. And a spattering of pine nuts. Melt the marg. Add the avocado and soy milk (just enough to thin it out a bit) and heat until just warm. Serve over noodles.

Look how pretty and coy. If it had eyelashes, I think it would be batting them right now.

The 2008 Michigan Womyn's Music Festival

Michfest is such a unique experience that it is near impossible to talk about with folks who haven't actually experienced it. Quite honestly, it makes people uncomfortable. For up to 7 days, you are immersed in a women-only, primarily queer space, feasting on non-stop music, workshops, healthy food, and more. It is a place to recharge, an entity to run to after dealing with the bullshit (politics, misogyny, homophobia) of the world the whole other 358 days of the year.

When you take the experiences home and talk about them, more often than not, it just results in frustrations because people JUST DON'T GET IT. They roll their eyes and call it a dykefest. Or they stereotype it as crazy goddess-heady women running around topless in the woods. Or they box it into "a festival of angry women." And yeah, it actually IS all of these things. But that's only the tip of the iceberg. It's a big space. A space that turns all your notions on their head. A space that reminds you that, yeah, shit still ain't perfect for folks who aren't straight white males, and THAT'S BULLSHIT. And sometimes it's really just good to be reminded of that.

Since the ineffability of this year's experience was pretty strong, I instead share it with you through pictures. (And my apologies. I got so swept up in the fun of the week that I forgot to take pics of a lot of the meals. BUT YOU WILL DEAL.)

Hope you enjoy.

(Porta-Janes)


FOOD AT THE FESTIVAL

(Many recipes can be found HERE if you're interested)

Food is served cafeteria-style. You bring your own plates and utensils and use them all week (hence the lovely compartmental tupperware featured in all my pics).

(Food tent & the start of the dinner line)

Daily Breakfast:

Scrambled eggs on Wednesday & Friday, scrambled tofu* on Thursday, and huevos rancheros on Sunday. Fruit*, granola, yogurt, bread (or sometimes rice cakes*), peanut butter* and tahini* are provided every day as well.

THURSDAY

Dinner:
Burritos *
Spanish Rice*
Lots 'o Fixings*



FRIDAY

Lunch:



Tuscan White Bean Salad*
Pasta Salad*

Dinner:
Moroccan Stew*
Banana Yogurt Raita
Sesame Kale*



SATURDAY

Lunch:



Carrot Salad
Cous Cous Salad*

Dinner:



Penne Pasta Puttanesca*
Steamed Broccoli*
Tossed Salad*



SUNDAY:

Brunch:



Huevos Rancheros
(Vegan option: Black beans*)
Corn Tortillas*
Salsa*

Dinner:



Savory Casserole*
Green Beans*
Tossed Salad*

*Vegan (or with vegan options)


(Our camping space this year)

WORKSHOPS I TOOK

Friday:

YOGA, BEGINNING (10am-11:30am)
Enjoy gentle stretching, relaxation, and breath training uniting your body, mind and spirit.

CHANGE YOUR BREATH, CHANGE YOUR LIFE (2:30pm-4pm)
Pranayama is often defined as breath control, and its true meaning is "life expansion." Come and learn how to change your life with breathing.



Saturday:

WOMEN'S STUDIES TODAY (9am-10:30am)
What's up with women's studies today? Bring your experiences, insights and questions. Discussion lead by womyn with graduate degrees.

FEMINISM (1pm-2:30pm)
There is no longer a women's movement - but its ideas and projects live on. Converse with us.

(Our feminism workshop)

WOMYN BUSINESS OWNERS (2:30pm-4:30pm)
If you have an old or new business, or are interested in starting one, come share, and network your ideas/experiences/tips with others.

PERFORMANCES WE SAW

THURSDAY

Acoustic Stage:


• Yang Ying


• The Vagina Monologues (performed by Alix Olson, Staceyann Chin, Marga Gomez, and Elvira Kurt, w/special guest C. C. Carter)




Night Stage:


• Hanifah Walidah


• Ferron and Bitch


• Von Iva



FRIDAY

Day Stage:

Hip Hop at High Noon:


• JenRo


Acoustic Stage:




• Ellis with Anne Heaton


• Natalia Zukerman


• Jambalaya




Night Stage:


• Isle of Klezbos


• Erin McKeown (whom I still would like to marry, thank you and please)


• Toshi Reagon and Big Lovely




SATURDAY

Acoustic Stage:


• emma's revolution


• Holly Near


• Laura Love and HarpersFerry




Night Stage:


• Patty Larkin


• Antigone Four


• Chix Lix Flix (a compendium of songs from films as performed by all the night-stage musicians and more)




SUNDAY

Day Stage:


• Comedy w/ Sandra Valls




Acoustic Stage:


• The Drumsong Orchestra


• One World Inspirational Choir

(There were many other performances that, due to timing of workshops, I managed to miss. But you can read about the rest HERE. Also worth noting is my favoritest of MC's, Elvira Kurt who is funny as shit.)




(Gorgeousness of The Land)

Cold Sesame Noodles

                                    from BitterSweet


Yes, the Prodigal Daughter of Veganism has returned. (That's me. And also a joke. I'm not THAT egotistical.) Anyways, I left my Michfest program at home, and I'd like to be as specific as possible when I share all my foodiness and experiences with you this week, so I figured I'd wait to post about it until tomorrow. Today, I instead bring you a recipe. If you can believe it. That's true dedication: returning from four days in the woods WITH a recipe to share. BUDDA BLAM!!! TAKE THAT!

Anyways, I made this pre-Michfest for lunch a couple weeks ago. It looked tasty. As does mostly anything on Hannah's blog. And I, of course, was not disappointed. I actually will say that I liked this quite a bit more than the spicy peanut noodle recipe I tried from the Vegetarian Times ever so long ago. It's got kick, but it also has a nice roasty depth to it from the sesame seeds. And I like the use of tahini in it as well because it gives it a markedly distinct flavor. Plus, goddamn people, it's super fricking simple to make. So yeah: go make it. Preferably topless. You know, in the spirit of Michfest and all.

INGREDIENTS:

• 7 - 8 oz. soba noodles or spaghetti


• 1/3 c. Tahini


• 3 T. soy sauce


• 1 T. rice vinegar (or regular vinegar if you don't have rice handy)


• 1/4 c. water


• 1 garlic clove


• 1/2" fresh ginger root


• 1 t. brown sugar


• 1/2 - 1 t. red pepper flakes


• 1 carrot


• 1 zucchini


• 2 T. toasted sesame seeds


• 2 T. chopped chives

DIRECTIONS

Cook the noodles as you normally would, drain, and rinse with cold water. Set aside.

In a large bowl, whisk together the tahini, soy sauce, vinegar, and water. Finely mince the garlic and ginger before stirring them in as well, along with the sugar and pepper. Dump the noodles into the bowl and toss them so that they’re all thoroughly coated with sauce.

Peel your carrot and julienne it, along with the zucchini, before tossing them into the bowl and mixing again.

Cover with plastic wrap and throw the whole thing into your refrigerator until you’re ready to serve.

It will last 2 or 3 days, but the sauce will become thicker/dryer as it grows older, so you may want to stir in extra water if that’s the case.

When you’re ready to eat, just sprinkle sesame seeds and fresh chives over the top. Done!

(Makes 4 Servings)

(Recipe from Hannah at BitterSweet)

Michfest Ho!

Btw, today is the last day you will be hearing from me until next Tuesday rolls around. I am very excited to inform you all that I will be spending most of the week at the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival again (it's been a couple years, and I am pretty much EXPLOSIVE with excitement).




You have my promise that I will take many pictures, particularly of the food. The typical dinner menu consists of the following (and I haven't even GOTTEN to the breakfasts and lunches), so get to drooling:

• Monday--Sandwiches


• Tuesday--Nut Loaf


• Wednesday--Chickpea Eggplant Spinach Ragout


• Thursday--Burrito Night!


• Friday--Savory Casserole


• Saturday--Pasta Putenesca

To tide you over until next week, you can read about my past Michfest adventures HERE. Just pace yourself.

See you next week, my lovelies!

More Squishy-Love-Shared-Cooking!

N-A whipped up this pasta from scratch last week after we spent the humid summer afternoon lazing about. Maybe we should eat something, he said. Yes, maybe, I said. And so we did.

For some reason, I take the WORST pictures in his kitchen. Which is a shame because it's a damn cute kitchen. I must work on this. So please excuse the Bigfoot-esque quality to the pics:

The sauce was a mix of olive oil, ketchup, and seasonings. The vegetable portion consisted of red and green peppers, steak-cut shrooms, and portabellas. But what really made this noteworthy was the fact that he added strawberries to the mix. I was like, Wow, did you just throw STRAWBERRIES into that? And he was all, Yeah, pasta sauce always needs a little sweetness to it, and they kinda look like mushrooms but have a sweet kick to them. Brilliant? I think so. Because despite my skepticism, he was 100% correct. It was a nice burst of flavor to bite into a sweet strawberry every once in a while. And they actually complimented the sweet bitterness of the peppers quite a bit as well.

In return, I cooked an old repeat that I hadn't made in quite some time (Hit-the-Pan-Salsa Pasta), mostly because my jalapeno pepper plant has been BURSTING with jalapenos, so I wanted to finally use a couple of them (you can see them spooning below). I still dig this pasta sauce--it's perfect for the summer since it uses a wealth of fresh summery veggies. It also requires very minimal heat-producing time on the stove (five minutes at most), so you won't sweat up your kitchen. And it's not heavy or hot--it's a light, punch-filled pasta sauce.




On the side, I whipped up a very simple and yet AWESOMELY flavorful asparagus salad. I've made other versions before, but this actually is my favorite, and actually the simplest of all of them. And the balsamic is a much better choice of vinegar by way of flavor. Apple cider vinegar is kind of flat in comparison to the sexy depth that balsamic lends to strawberries. So yeah. There you have it.

SWEET STRAWBERRY-BALSAMIC ASPARAGUS SALAD

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 small container strawberries, rinsed and sliced


• 1 bunch asparagus, tough ends removed & cut into 2" pieces


• 2 T. balsamic vinegar


• 1 T. olive oil

DIRECTIONS

Toss your strawberries into a bowl. Drizzle the balsamic vinegar over the top of them, and let them sit for at least an hour.

In the meantime, heat up your olive oil in a skillet on medium heat. Toss in your asparagus and cook for about 3-5 minutes. Toss in a little handful of water, and throw a lid over the skillet. Cook for a few more minutes, until asparagus is tender but not soggy. Remove from heat and let cool.

Add asparagus to the strawberry/vinegar mix. Toss. Serve.