Favorite Summer Quickie...

Not counting that of the wink-wink nudge-nudge variety:


Lightly fried tofu, fresh tomatoes, fresh basil, slathered
in pesto-mayo and stacked atop ciabatta.

Grub I Done Cooked for Another

Sexy kalamata & sundried tomato tapenade on a whole-wheat baguette. Fettucine with edamame pesto, heaped with roasted asparagus and zucchini, a mix of mushrooms, and shallots. Accompanied by a side of roasted brussel sprouts.


What I learned: the best part of the meal was when the brussel sprouts accidentally got mixed in with the pasta, so next time I make this, it's gonna be roasted zucchini, mushrooms, shallots, and roasted brussel sprouts. So so good.

Sexy Kalamata & Sundried Tomato Tapenade

This tapenade was having-a-dude-go-down-on-you-without-expecting-you-to-reciprocate good. In other words, IT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND. (And you won't have to blow anything in return. ;)



INGREDIENTS:

• 1 ¼ c. pitted kalamata olives (I also added some big fat green ones and some other greek black ones in as well)


• 9-10 oil-packed sundried tomatoes


• 2 T. capers


• 4 cloves garlic


• Handful of parsley


• 1/2 T. balsamic vinegar


• 1/2 T. oil from your oil-packed sundried tomatoes


• Freshly-ground black pepper, to taste

DIRECTIONS

Blend that shit. Blend it real hard. Oh just like that. Yes yes yes.

Spread on a toasted baguette. Spread it. Mmmmm.

Makes enough for an entire baguette and then some.

(Recipe © Yeah That "Vegan" Shit)

I Got Interviewed on VeganSaurus!

Go check 'em out if you haven't already!


VEGANSAURUS!

'LIKE' them! Love them! And then take off in the morning before they wake up!

My Foccacia is Poofy

So I tried making foccacia last night using the recipe from Veganomicon. I would've thought it would be more difficult to mess it up than it would be to make it correctly, and yet: my foccacia turned out poofy.



Granted, it tastes really good. But it tastes like bread and not foccacia.

What did I do wrong? Too much kneading? Too little kneading? Too much water? Too little water?

Any thoughts about my poofy foccacia would be appreciated.

Also, is it just me, or does "poofy foccacia" not sound like a brilliant euphemism for lady nethers? Just sayin'.

What to Eat If You Never Want Anyone to Make Out With You Ever Again

On the weekend, my friend Peppermint came over for a LLP night, and we cooked. I've been wanting to try the Appetite for Reduction onion rings for a while, so she brought over some homemade veggie burgers to accompany them. To make matters worse for our breath, we added caramelized onions to the burgers as well, making it one hell of a stank dinner. However, both of us had to admit, the onion rings were really quite good. I used corn-flake "bread" crumbs instead of wheat, and the breading ended up kind of messy, but the one hand per bowl technique seems like a myth anyways since, as soon as you dip into the breadcrumbs, you end up clumping that shit up. Either which way though: oh man are they delish. And super easy. I'd definitely make them again. Even if that means not making out with anyone for a week as a result.


OMG Oven Baked Onion Rings

INGREDIENTS:

• 2 vidalia onions (about a pound), or other sweet onion like Walla Walla


• 1/2 c. plus 2 T. all purpose flour


• 2 T. corn starch


• 1 c. cold almond milk (I used soy milk)


• 1 t. apple cider vinegar


• 1 c. whole wheat bread crumbs (I used corn-flake "bread" crumbs)


• 1 t. kosher salt


• 2 t. olive oil


• Cooking spray

DIRECTIONS

Slice onions into 3/4 inch thick rings. Separate the rings and place in a bowl. Cover with a kitchen towel or something, to keep the onioniness out of your eyes.

Preheat oven to 450 F. Line a rimmed 12×18 baking sheet with parchment paper, spray with cooking spray and set aside.

Now you’ll need two bowls for batter and breading. If you’ve got large, wide cereal bowls that’ll do the trick. In one bowl, dump in the flour and cornstarch. Add about half of the almond milk and stir vigorously with a fork to dissolve. Add the rest of the almond milk and the apple cider vinegar, and stir to incorporate. Set aside.

In the other bowl, mix together the bread crumbs and salt. Drizzle in the oil and use your fingertips to mix it up well.

Assemble the onion rings:

Get a conveyor belt going. From left to right, have the onions, the flour mixture, the breadcrumbs mixture and lastly the baking sheet. Dip each onion slice into the the flour, letting the excess drip off. Transfer to the breadcrumbs bowl and use the other hand to sprinkle a handful of breadcrumbs over the onion, to coat completely. This may take a bit of practice. Carefully transfer each onion to a single layer on the baking sheet. Make sure you use one hand for the wet batter and the other for the dry batter, or you’ll end up with club hand.

Spray rings lightly with cooking spray and bake for 8 minutes. Flip, and bake another 6 minutes. Rings should be varying shades of brown and crisp. Taste one to check for doneness. Serve as soon as possible. With ketchup if you must.

Note from cookbook: Coupla things. You have to use sweet onions for this, like vidalia or walla walla. Otherwise the taste won’t be as special and the texture won’t be as juicy. Also, if things go as planned, you’re not going to use all of the onions or all of the coating. Just use the nice big rings and use the tiny inside rings for something else. For the batter and coating, you need a lot to get everything breaded, but there will be a bunch left over. Them’s the breaks.

(Recipe from Appetite for Reduction, reposted at Go Dairy Free)



WHAT YOU SHOULD SERVE IF YOU WANT TO BE ABLE TO GET SOMEONE DRUNK ENOUGH THAT THEY WON'T NOTICE ALL THE ONION ON YOUR BREATH:

(Ginger beer, vodka, lime juice, muddled mint)

Caramel Bars of Ooey Gooey Goodness

Ok. So these bars are the shit. Like seriously: they are the shit. As in, I subbed in corn syrup for the brown rice syrup (because I had extra and needed an excuse to use it up) and I TOTALLY DON'T FEEL BAD ABOUT IT 'cause even though I may end up in hell, being thwacked by a sweaty, whip-wielding Michael Pollan, IT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT. That's how good they are. Use brown rice syrup when you make them, just so you don't end up blaspheming like me. (But if you DO end up using corn syrup, I seriously think even God will forgive you because FOR THE LOVE OF GOD THEY'RE SO GODDAMN GOOD.) Just sayin'.

INGREDIENTS:

Crust


• 2 c. all-purpose flour


• 1/3 c. dark brown sugar


• ¼ t. ground cinnamon


• ¼ t. baking powder


• Large pinch of salt


• ¾ c. non-hydrogenated margarine, slightly softened


Topping


• 3 T. cornstarch


• 1/3 c. non-dairy milk (soy, rice, almond, etc.)


• 1½ c. dark brown sugar


• 1/3 c. brown rice syrup


• 2 T. melted non hydrogenated margarine


• 2 t. pure vanilla extract


• ¼ t. salt


• 2 c. coarsely chopped pecans

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a 9 by 13-inch baking pan with aluminium foil, making sure the foil completely covers the sides of the pan, with about 2 inches folded outside over the edges. Spray the bottom and sides of the pan generously with non-stick cooking spray

In a mixing bowl, combine the flour, brown sugar, cinnamon, baking powder and salt. Use a pastry cutter or two knives held together to cut in the margarine until the mixture resembles fine crumbs. Pour crumbs into the prepared baking pan and press down evenly and very firmly, making sure to press the mixture all the way to the edges of the pan.

Bake the crust for 8 to 10 minutes until very firm and very lightly browned. Remove the pan from the oven and set it aside.

In a large bowl, whisk together the cornstarch and non-dairy milk until foamy. Stir in the dark brown sugar, brown rice syrup, melted margarine, vanilla and salt, until smooth. Fold in the pecans and pour the mixture onto the crust, using a spatula to spread the topping evenly.

Return the pan to the oven and bake for 28 to 30 minutes, or until the filling is rapidly bubbling. Place the pain on a wire rack to cool for 20 minutes; then move it to the refrigerator to finish cooling and setting. Chill for at least two hours, or, even better, overnight.

To slide completely cooled bars, grab hold of the foil and carefully lift the whole thing out of the pan and onto a heavy cutting board.

Peel away the foil and cut bars with a heavy, sharp knife.

(Recipe from Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar, reposted at Vegan Gourmet Caravan)

Suelo Part Deux

Yesterday, Suelo rescued a flea-ridden, eye-infected kitten from a park and then drove around until he found a shelter that would take it. He followed THAT up by spontaneously cooking us a three-part meal that included

delectably decadent and creamy sage and butternut squash soup:



spicy curried cauliflower, and a roasted lettuce salad in a creamy red-wine and pine nut sauce:



all of which rocked.

You may now slather him with praise.