Monday, October 01, 2007

I Have Never Wanted a Cyborg-Monocle **SO BADLY**!

Holy mother of all things holy and motherly!

I got nabbed for a blog interview at, and they've been trying to encourage us to get our readers to vote for us so that we can win shit, so I put up that button discretely on my sidebar (because I'm not a fan of begging people to vote for me and whatnot, so I wasn't even gonna mention it). **BUT THEN!** Out of boredom, I just happened to go look at what their prizes are, and I saw this picture, and I realized that I TOTALLY WANT THE SPY CAR JUST SO I CAN WEAR THAT SWEET-ASS CYBORG-MONOCLE TO WORK ALL THE FRICKING TIME AND THEN WHENEVER ANYONE ASKS ME A QUESTION (I've decided to stop capitalizing because it's making me feel winded), I'll slowly and robotically turn my head towards them while making a VRRRRRT noise (that's a robot-sounding noise) like Arnold in Terminator 2 and I'll say to them, very robotically, "I'm a cybernetic organism: living tissue over a metal endoskeleton. Come with me if you want to live." And it will be the GREATEST MOMENT IN WORK HISTORY **EVER**.

Holy seriousness, Batman. How sweet IS this shit?!?!

We believe in the power of a child's imagination. Our toys encourage kids to be imaginative, creative and to explore the world around them.

We create quality, award-winning toys for boys and girls that are safe, durable and lots of fun.

We make innovative toys that appeal to both parents and kids. Our toys spark imagination and provide positive experiences.

Also, I just have to note how funny it is that the company is playing up their product as one that "encourage[s] kids to be imaginative, creative and to explore the world around them" because you SO know that the first 13-year old boy that gets their hands on that car is gonna immediately send it driving up to some hot chick in a short skirt.

Tell me it's not true.

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