Tuesday, August 14, 2007

The Incredible Spreadable "Meat"loaf

So I made this meatloaf recipe like a month ago, and I keep avoiding posting it since the pictures I took of it are SO fricking hideous.

So in order to distract you from their hideousness, I post a couple f-ing hot pictures. *DISTRACT DISTRACT*

And here's one for all you penis-toters out there, because we wouldn't wanna forget about you!


Anyways, this recipe is WICKED flavorful. The only problem is that it is also wicked crumbly. However, I will give it the benefit of the doubt and say that perhaps it is a) because my measurements were slightly off or something (You?!? With incorrect measurements, Lindy Loo?!?! I THINK NOT!) or b) because I used a silicon bread-pan.

Nonetheless, MAN ALIVE was this a yummy meatloaf. I ended up just sorta spreading it on shit (bread, oatmeal, Theresa's inner thigh--OH SNAP!!) and eating it that way, kind of like a meatloaf pate or something. So I *do* recommend, despite the hideous pictures...


(If I hear even *one* word about how The Strokes
are not hot at all--which I hear *all* the
fricking time--I shall promptly banish you
all from my blog! They are pretty, and if I
were into vegan cannibalism, I would eat them.)

  • 1/4 c. walnuts

  • 2 stalks celery, finely chopped (about 1 c.)

  • 1/2 medium onion, finely chopped (about 3/4 c.)

  • 2 green onions, thinly sliced (about 1/3 c.)

  • 2 cloves garlic, minced (about 2 t.)

  • 1 10-oz. pkg. firm tofu, drained

  • 1 12-oz. pkg. soy crumbles

  • 1 1/4 c. quick-cooking oats

  • 3 T. low-sodium soy sauce (or regular if you like heart attacks)

  • 2 T. ketchup, plus additional 2 T. for topping

  • 1 T. Dijon mustard

  • 2 t. dried parsley or 2 T. chopped fresh parsley

  • 1 t. poultry seasoning


Preheat oven to 350F. Grind walnuts to powder in food processor. Set aside. Coat medium skillet with cooking spray and place over medium heat. Add celery, onion, green onions and garlic, and sauté 4 to 5 minutes, or until vegetables are tender. Remove from heat, and cool.

Mash tofu in bowl. Stir in walnuts, vegetables, soy crumbles, oats, soy sauce, ketchup, mustard, parsley and poultry seasoning. Season with salt and pepper.

Coat 9x5-inch loaf pan with cooking spray and spoon mixture into pan, lightly packing in. Spread thin layer of ketchup over top of loaf, and bake 55 to 60 minutes, or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool, then wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate until ready to slice for sandwiches.

(Recipe from the Vegetarian Times)

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