WOOO WOOO WOOO!!!! <----That's the mock-meat siren, alerting you to the fact that you're about to be hit by a F-5 mock-meat recipe!
IF YOU ARE CAUGHT OUTSIDE...SEEK SHELTER IN A NEARBY REINFORCED BUILDING. AS A LAST RESORT...SEEK SHELTER IN A CULVERT...DITCH OR LOW SPOT AND COVER YOUR HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS.
THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE DURING A F-5 MOCK-MEAT RECIPE IS IN A BASEMENT. GET UNDER A WORKBENCH OR OTHER PIECE OF STURDY FURNITURE. IF NO BASEMENT IS AVAILABLE...SEEK SHELTER ON THE LOWEST FLOOR OF THE BUILDING IN AN INTERIOR HALLWAY OR ROOM SUCH AS A CLOSET. USE BLANKETS OR PILLOWS TO COVER YOUR BODY AND ALWAYS STAY AWAY FROM WINDOWS.
IF IN MOBILE HOMES OR VEHICLES...EVACUATE THEM AND GET INSIDE A SUBSTANTIAL SHELTER. IF NO SHELTER IS AVAILABLE...LIE FLAT IN THE NEAREST DITCH OR OTHER LOW SPOT AND COVER YOUR HEAD WITH YOUR HANDS.
Oh yeah, and somewhere in there, bust out a pan and spatula, and get to cooking!
LINDY LOO's BREAKFAST SCRAMBLE
- 1 cube of extra-firm tofu, drained and crumbled
- 1/2 tube of fake-sausage, crumbled (I used GIMME LEAN)
- One small onion, diced
- 1/2 green pepper, diced
- 1 to 1.5 c. cooked/canned black beans, drained
- 1/2 packet of taco seasoning
- 1 T. vegetable oil
- Salsa (preferably Newman's Own Black Bean & Corn Salsa)
- Optional: tortillas or some sort of cooked, diced breakfast potatoes*
In a large pan or skillet, heat your oil. When hot, add your onion, green pepper, and fake-sausage. Cook until the sausage is brown and the onions are either browned or translucent. Add your tofu and 1/2 packet of taco seasoning, mixing everything until the seasonings are evenly distributed. Add your black beans. Cook until tofu is heated through and/or beginning to brown (depending on how you like your tofu).
Serve in warm tortillas or over breakfast-potatoes with a generous helping of salsa. (I prefer the one listed above, simply because it makes the breakfast scramble taste kind of old-school and McDonald's-y for some reason.)
Makes 4-6 servings.
* The first day, I served these in tortillas. With leftovers, I whipped up a batch of breakfast potatoes and served it over them. To make the potatoes, I simply diced up about 6 or 7 small red potatoes. I tossed them with some olive oil, garlic powder, and seasoned salt, and then I threw them in the oven for about 1/2 an hour at 450 or so, or until cooked through.