Thursday, July 27, 2006

If God Had Meant for Cornbread to Have Sugar In It, He Would've Called it Cake

No recipes or pictures today--I didn't do much cooking this week because I was very very busy with other more important and crazed things instead.

Good news though: this weekend E is having a vegan wine-tasting party (woot woot) so expect pictures and recipes and details out the ass. I already have plans to make at least three whores-devores (I suck at remembering how to spell that damnable word--taking a wild guess--h'ors douerves; plus, whores-devores looks more like what it should sound like anyways).

In the meantime, I thought I'd post this for some cheap laughs.

I've gotten a few constructive criticisms about the title of this blog since I started it, but I've been want to change it because, well, this blog's for fun, peoples, and I'm a swearer. I'm not trying to win the Oscar for Best Supporting Vegan Food Blog or anything--I just do this shit to keep myself entertained and to show folks that you can be vegan and eat like a queen (*donning feather boa and 8-inch platform shoes*). So if that means not getting my recipes picked up by folks to be posted elsewhere, ah well--I really ain't too concerned, my lovelies.

And I have to say, lately I've found myself slapped silly with a big fat grin on my face for keeping the current title of this bloggy blog, simply because my blog title causes itself to be stumbled across with some of the most BIZARRE google searches you can think of (which I've noticed through my sitemeter).

So today, I thought I'd post some of my favorite google searches which apparently result in my blog:
  • boca roasted onion good shit

  • if god had meant for cornbread to have sugar in it he would've called it cake

  • vegan food tastes like shit

  • shit on a salad

  • shit pie recipe

The most frequent google search that apparently pulls up my blog is "expired tofu" (variation: "expired tofu sick"--heh heh) which is kind of intriguing--apparently I am the person to go to if you wanna figure out whether that hunk of expired tofu you're currently gnawing on is gonna make you projectile vomit everywhere. You can call me "Dr. Tofu."

But my all-time ultimate favorite google search that apparently retrieves my blog as a result is--*drum roll*...

  • vegan black olives feces


  • I really just wanna know--what in god's name was this person trying to figure out that warranted a search with that specific word combination?

    In response, let me just shout this:

    Pubic pumpernickel booger snot.

    We'll see if THAT ever retrieves a google search. =)

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