Scrumptious Turd Dogs

To be added to my menagerie of scatological recipes (i.e. ones that resemble dookie and/or puke) are Vegan Dad's homemade sausages.

Don't get me wrong: the recipe kicks serious dookie-shooting ass. And it's really super-simple to whip up.

But then there's this (fathers, shield your babies' eyes!!!):



Needless to say, when you wrap the sausages in foil BE SURE TO CINCH THE ENDS TIGHTLY.

Otherwise you and everyone else at your barbecue will call them Turd Dogs all night.



VEGAN DAD'S HOMEMADE SAUSAGES

INGREDIENTS:

• 1/2 c. pinto beans, rinsed and drained


• 1 c. cold vegetable broth


• 1 T. olive oil


• 2 T. soy sauce


• 2 cloves garlic, grated (with a microplane, or very finely minced)


• 1-1/4 c. vital wheat gluten


• 1/4 c. nutritional yeast


• 1-1/2 t. fennel seed, crushed (Lindy Loo sidenote: can you BUY this shit crushed? Because I've tried crushing it myself, and I don't even think the Incredible Hulk could pull it off.)


• 1 t. red pepper flakes


• 1 t. sweet paprika


• 1 t. dried oregano


• Several dashes fresh black pepper

DIRECTIONS

Before mixing your ingredients, get your steaming apparatus ready, bring water to a full boil. The rest of the recipe comes together very quickly.

Have ready 6 sheets of tin foil. In a large bowl, mash the pinto beans until no whole ones are left. Throw all the other ingredients together in the order listed and mix with a fork. Divide dough into 6 even parts. Place one part of dough into tin foil and mold into about a 5 inch log. Wrap dough in tin foil, like a tootsie roll. Don't worry too much about shaping it (EXCEPT FOR THE ENDS, PEOPLE--CINCH THOSE WIENERS TIGHT!/end lindy loo cry of desperation), it will snap into shape while it's steaming because this recipe is awesome.

Place wrapped sausages in steamer and steam for 40 minutes.

(Recipe from Vegan Dad)



(The rest of Lindy Loo's scatological menagerie can be found HERE.)

This Year's Rooftop Garden

So my rooftop garden is up and running again. I'm not planting any Don Knotts this year like I did last year, but I *did* convert my old papasan frame into an herb garden, so hopefully that makes up for it.

Why not join me on a tour?

This is kind of the skyline view of my rooftop garden. Thankfully now that everything's potted, the pots have stopped toppling over the edge of the roof. In the foreground you can see my ladybug sandbox that I garbage-picked, the lid of which the cats sleep under on hot days and stalk birds from (unsuccessfully)...



And in closeups...

Black-seeded simpson lettuce, lavender, grape tomato plant, Zooey:



A couple heirloom tomato plants, more lettuce, wildflowers, moonflowers, mint, and green onions:



This is what my cats and I refer to as "the stink pipe" which is the pipe connected to my downstairs neighbor's toilet. As you can see, my goal is to camouflage it a bit (and discourage the cats from sniffing in it all the time)... Planted here is catnip, leeks, chives, basil, wildflowers, and a jalapeno plant.



This is my newest addition to my rooftop garden: my papasan herb garden. It's made from an old papasan frame and some landscaping fabric. The white twine leading out of it and up onto the doorframe is going to (hopefully) allow the peas to climb. In it: basil, cilantro, chives, green onions, black-seeded simpson lettuce, and peas. Fran is a big fan of the shade it produces, as you can see.







And finally: a small portion of the 36 basil plants I have growing. Yes, I am ridiculous. And yes, I love me some basil.



Stay tuned for more tales of urban gardening as the season progresses!

Dumb Stupid Stupid Dumb

Recently I made the understatement of the year, that On Guerrilla Gardening was "somewhat interesting."

Don't listen to me! I have no idea what I'm talking about! Who's that crazy lady? Why she saying stupid things like that! She doesn't even know her right from her left! Did you see how her one eye is kind of lazy? You can't trust a person with a lazy eye!

This book is awesome. I am inspired. And I have already made plans to attack some areas in my neighborhood, renegade-style.



So don't listen to the me from then, listen to the me from now. And GET YOUR HANDS ON THIS BOOK! It'll shake up your way of looking at things.