Pumpkin Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Pecan Cookies

                        from Cupcake Punk

Hmmmm. Apparently I shouldn't wait so long to post about a recipe, because when I do, I sometimes kind of forget my thoughts on the recipe. Which doesn't make for the most useful of recipe-postings.

Case in point: These Pumpkin Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Pecan Cookies. I think I made them about three weeks ago. And boy were they... ummm... cookie-ish! Like, they were SO cookie-ish that I was like, Wow: Cookies. And the pumpkin was so very... pumpkiny. And you'd think the pecans would be pecany, but they were chocolate-chippy if you can believe that! Oh wait. No. My bad, the chocolate chips were what was so chocolate-chippy. And also, I mean, talk about round and slightly lumpy-ish like, in that way that cookies are? Totally the case. Again, perfect examples of the existence of cookies.

Yeah.

And what further complicates the issue when I wait too long to blog about a dessert recipe is the fact that I will pretty much eat ANYTHING if it's sweet. So although I *DO* remember plowing through a good dozen of these by myself over the course of no more than a couple of days, given my love of sugary desserts, that means absolutely nothing. They could've tasted like sugar-covered dookie, and I would've been like, "Dookie me up some more dookie, o sugar-covered dookie!"

Like, this weekend I bought this GLORIOUS vegan oreo cookie cupcake at Nature's Bin as a treat. This thing was like sugar from heaven. Seriously: it was like 2/3 frosting, 1/3 cake. Which is pretty much exactly the way I love cake. And by that I mean Screw cake--I really just love frosting.

Anyways, I decided to chow down on this cupcake on Friday night, and seriously: I was a little bit concerned that I was going to die. Of sugar. Like my death certificate would read Cause of death: Sugar:

ME (eating cupcake): moan

N-A: What's the matter?

ME: I think this is the sugariest thing I've ever eaten. In my whole life.

N-A: Um. Then stop eating it.

ME: But it's SOOOOOO good. (taking another bite)

N-A: stares at me as though I am ridiculous

ME: Blorf. Oh my god.

N-A: Seriously. Stop eating it.

ME: I don't want to waste it though. 'Cause it's sooooo good. (shoveling in another bite and leaving one last bite remaining) Dammit. (moaning again) I can't do it. I think if I try to eat it I will die. Like actually die. Or throw up. Ungh.

N-A: rolling eyes

So yeah. Things I can vouch for with these cookies: They had sugar in them. They were cookie-ish. And I ate at least a dozen in two days. Which means they were either good or terrible. So if you like cookie-ish cookies, you'll love these. Cookies!

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 c. Earth Balance, room temperature


• 1 c. packed brown sugar


• 1 c. granulated sugar


• 1 c. pumpkin puree


• 1 T. apple butter or apple sauce


• 1 t. vanilla extract


• 2 c. all-purpose flour


• 1-1/3 c. quick or old-fashioned oats


• 1 t. baking soda


• 1 t. ground cinnamon


• 1 t. ground cardamom (I omitted this 'cause I didn't have any)


• 1/2 t. salt


• 1 c. chocolate chips


• 1/2 c. chopped pecans

DIRECTIONS
Preheat the oven to 350F.

Beat the Earth Balance and sugars together until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes.

Add the apple butter/sauce, vanilla, and pumpkin puree and beat for another 3 minutes.

In a separate bowl combine the flour, oats, baking soda, salt, cardamom and cinnamon and whisk together. Slowly add it to the butter mixture until just combined, being sure to scrape down the sides and bottom once or twice to ensure even mixing.

Fold in the chocolate chips and pecans. Drop spoonfuls of dough on cookie sheets lined with parchment paper.

Bake for 13-15 minutes. Allow to cool on the tray for a minute or two to set, then move to a wire rack to finish cooling.

(recipe from Cupcake Punk)

Peanut Butter-Oatmeal Cookies

                                    from the Vegetarian Times

They look so seductive and plump and rich and chocolate-chippy. But really, they were just kind of eh. So disappointing. Kinda like convincing that hot as HELL bar-chick to come home with you after spending an hour trying to figure out JUST the right pick-up line, and then all she does is file her nails the whole time you're doing it. You know what I'm talking about?? Disappointing.

Here's the thing: they didn't barely taste sweet. Granted, I have a sweet tooth. But still. They were just very underwhelming in flavor and sweetness. This was tempered some when you'd bite into a chocolate chip, but even with that: perhaps they needed more chocolate chips.

Long and short: There are much better vegan oatmeal cookies (example), vegan peanut butter cookies (this one you have to do your homework on), and vegan peanut butter oatmeal cookies (check out VwaV) elsewhere.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1.5 c. unbleached flour (I just used regular all-purpose)


• 1/2 c. rolled or old-fashioned oats


• 1/2 t. baking soda


• 1/2 t. salt


• 1 c. light brown sugar


• 1/4 c. nonhydrogenated vegetable shortening


• 1/4 c. canola oil


• 1/4 c. creamy peanut butter


• 1 T. egg replacer powder


• 5 T. water


• 1 t. vanilla extract


• 1 c. vegan chocolate chips

DIRECTIONS

Prehead oven to 375F.

Combine flour, oats, baking soda, and salt in a medium bowl.

Beat brown sugar, shortening, and oil with an electric mixer until smooth and fluffy. Add peanut butter, and beat until well combined.

Stir together 5 T. of water and egg replacer powder in a measuring cup. Beat egg replacer mixture and vanilla into brown sugar mixture until smooth.

Beat flour mixture into wet mixture, then add chocolate chips, and mix until combined. Scoop 1-T. dollops of dough 3-inches apart on an ungreased baking sheet. Flatten dough balls into 1/2 inch thickness with fingers (assuming you can--my dough was so mushy that it sort of did this on its own).

Bake 12 minutes, or until cookies are golden brown and dry on top.

Cool on baking sheet 5 minutes, then transfer to a wire rack to cool.

Makes about 26 cookies.

(Recipe from the (I think) Aug./Sept 2008 issue of the Veg Times)

Key Lime Meltaways

                         from Smitten Kitchen

So I made these last week. Not sure what possessed me, as I'm not a particularly big lime nerd. But they sounded simple, and for some reason I have a fondness for cookie dough that requires refrigerating. I have NO clue why. But it's probably the same brain-weirdness that makes me angry at recipes that require yeast.

Anyways, they turned out delightfully cute, albeit a bit dry for my tastebuds.

Pluses: They are wonderfully limey, and also meltingly delicate.

Minuses: Holy crap my arm was about to fall off from all the zesting. And I think maybe the cornstarch might need to be tweaked somehow. As I'm not a master of all things bakery (a "masterbaker"--*snickersnickersnicker*--one might say), I don't really know how important the cornstarch is to the recipe. But the cookies DID taste rather dry in that kind of way where, once saliva hits the cookie-pulp inside your mouth, it suddenly turns into glue. Which makes them sound awful, but trust me: they totally are not. At all. I think it might just be a case of me being picky, seeing as I had quite a few people tell me they liked them, and I had a coworker ask for the recipe. So yeah: picky Lindy Loo is probably just the culprit.

RANDOMNESS: I think these would make a fun addition to a margarita night--they have the perfect pucker to complement.

RANDOMNESS #2: Am I the only person who is so measuringly-challenged that I have to actually take out a ruler to figure out what the hell, say, 1/4" would actually LOOK like? I often wonder this.

INGREDIENTS:

• 3/4 c. nonhydrogenated vegan margarine*


• 1 c. confectioners’ sugar


• Grated zest of 4 tiny or 2 large key limes (I just realized I don't really know if there's a difference between key limes and just lime limes, but I used the latter of the two if there is)


• 2 T. freshly squeezed lime juice


• 1 T. pure vanilla extract


• 1 3/4 c. + 2 T. all-purpose flour


• 2 T. cornstarch


• 1/4 teaspoon salt (I omitted this, since the original recipe called for unsalted butter, and vegan margarine is typically salted)

DIRECTIONS

In a large bowl, cream margarine and 1/3 c. sugar until fluffy. Add lime zest, juice, and vanilla; beat until fluffy. (I used a handheld mixer.)

In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, cornstarch, and salt (if you choose to use it). Add to margarine mixture, and beat on low speed until combined.

Use 1 or 2 pieces of parchment paper to roll dough into two 1 1/4-inch-diameter logs. Wrap. Chill at least 1 hour.

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Line two baking sheets with parchment. Place remaining 2/3 c. sugar in a resealable plastic bag (or plastic container). Remove parchment from logs; slice dough into 1/4-inch-thick rounds. Place rounds on baking sheets, spaced 1 inch apart (they do not spread).

Bake cookies until barely golden, about 15 minutes. Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool slightly, just three or four minutes. While still warm, place cookies in the sugar-filled bag; toss to coat.

Bake or freeze remaining dough. Store baked cookies in an airtight container for up to 2 weeks.

Makes about 5 dozen.

(Original recipe from Smitten Kitchen)

Garrick's Thin Bakery Style Chocolate Chip Cookies

This is a cookie.

His name is Morris.

Say hello to Morris.

Hello, Morris!

Morris is very tasty, though he was a little bit confusing to bake because some of his directions were slightly vague.

The long and short of it is if you want Morris to turn out DELIGHTFULLY toffee-like, make SURE you let him bake until his edges are a crispy golden-brown. He will FEEL squishy nonetheless, but as long as he looks like his edges are crisped-up, you will be good to go.

If you DON'T cook him until his edges are crisp, he'll just taste like a regular ol' chocolate chip cookie.

But if you obey these orders, you will end up with a pleasantly caramelly-chew-like cookie that will please everyone (except for Morris when he ends up in your tumbly).

INGREDIENTS:

• 2 & 1/4 c. unsifted all purpose flour


• 1 c. softened (not melted) vegan margarine


• 3/4 c. sugar


• 3/4 c. brown sugar


• 2 T. applesauce


• 1 t. baking soda


• 1 t. salt


• 1-2 t. vanilla extract


• 9 oz. (a little over a cup) vegan chocolate chips

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 375F. In a small bowl mix together flour, baking soda, and salt. In a large bowl, cream together brown sugar, sugar, vanilla, applesauce and margarine until it has a somewhat smooth texture. Slowly add flour mixture in and mix until smooth and thick. Stir in chocolate chips.

Scoop out dough with a tablespoon and place onto lined baking sheets. The dough should be more like thick batter, and when you spoon it onto the cookie sheet (I use parchment paper) they will already be pretty flat. [I did not find this to be the case, so I was kind of confused. Any which way your dough comes out, just roll with it. It'll be ok.]

Bake for around 7 minutes. They should still look kind of doughy in the center when you take them out, only mind the edges. [IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT! Make SURE the edges are a golden-brown and look sort of crispy. Otherwise you will not get the delightful toffee-like caramel-chew-esque texture.] As you let them cool the middle will solidify more into a toffee-like crispy/chewy texture.

(Recipe from Don't Eat Off the Sidewalk)

Chewy Chocolate-Raspberry Cookie Sammiches

So my birthday was this weekend. Fart fart blah blah and all that. And, being that I love a good excuse to bake, I decided to try out the Chewy Chocolate Raspberry Cookie recipe from Veganomicon.

But since the dessert was birthday-related, I figured it needed to be a bit bigger. A bit bolder. A bit more celebratory. Translation: Way more sugary and over-the-top. So after brainstorming a bit, and after reading the cookbook's suggestion that you try these cookies out as ice cream sandwiches, I thought to myself: WAIT! SUGARY = FROSTING = COOKIE SAMMICHES! And voila--these cookie sammiches were born.

And seriously: they are the best dessert I've had in forever. In fact, I gave one to one of my instructors to try the other day, and she stopped me in the hallway, with this glazed post-sex crazed glow in her eyes, and said to me: "Oh my god. That was seriously the best thing I've ever eaten." Not "the best dessert." Not "the best thing in the past few months." But the best thing EVER. Which, granted, was probably a *TINY* bit of an exaggeration. But only a tiny one. Because seriously: Screw cake for your birthday. These things will rope-a-dope the shit out of cake until it's too tired out to fight back for that belt.

The chocolate-raspberry cookies are wonderfully subtle-tasting, and AWESOMELY chewy. And the simple flavor of the cookies is balanced out by the completely ridiculous, sugary, decadent filling (from Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World) smooshed between them.

Good good stuff.

I post the complete recipe for the cookie sammiches, but if you want to just make the cookies themselves, obviously, just don't whip up the filling. *COUidjitGH*

Sidenote: I was a bit horrified to find this morning that you can find the WHOLE Veganomicon cookbook on-line in pdf form, if you happen to google-search the right terms. I don't know how nor why this is legal, but I'm not posting a link here because I think it's kind of bullshit. I know Isa is a generous gal (and has told me once that she didn't mind me posting a recipe out of VwaV), but THE WHOLE BOOK??? That's crap.

INGREDIENTS:

The Cookies:


• 1 c. raspberry preserves


• 2 c. sugar


• 2/3 c. canola oil


• 2 tsp vanilla extract


• 2 tsp almond extract


• 1 & 1/4 c. unsweetened cocoa powder (sifted if clumpy)


• 3 c. all-purpose flour


• 1.5 tsp baking soda


• 1/4 t. salt


The Filling:


• 1/4 c. vegan margarine (at room temp.)


• 1/4 c. vegan shortening (at room temp.)


• 2.5 c. powdered sugar


• 1/2 c. cocoa powder


• 3 T. soy milk


• 1 t. vanilla extract

DIRECTIONS:

Preheat the oven to 350˚F. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper.

In a large mixing bowl, stir together the raspberry preserves, sugar, canola oil, vanilla, and almond extract.

In a separate bowl sift together all the other cookie ingredients.

Add the dry to the wet in 3 batches, mixing well with a fork (or your hands) after each addition. When you get to the last batch, you may need to use your hands to work the batter into a soft and pliable dough.

Roll the dough into walnut-size balls and then flatten them with your hands into 2 1/2 inch diameter disks. Place on your cookie sheet (they need to be only 1/2 inch apart because they don’t spread out when baking).

Bake 10 minutes.

While they are baking, make your filling. (I did mine in a food-processor, because I didn't have a beater, but bless my sister's heart, she got me one for my b-day. Anyways, you can make it either which way, depending on what you've got at home.) Place the margarine and shortening in a bowl or in your food processor. Beat or process until blended. Add your vanilla and soy milk and process/beat some more. Add in your cocoa powder and beat/process until combined. Start adding the powdered sugar in small batches, beating/processing after each bit until fully combined (that way it doesn't clump). Once all of it's been added, beat/process until thick and fluffy.

Remove cookies from the oven and let cool for 5 minutes. Transfer to a cooling rack to cool completely.

Once your cookies are completely cooled, take a cookie and slather a generous helping of filling on the flat side. Take another cookie, and smoosh the two flat-sides of your cookies together. Repeat until all your cookies are gone. There should be EXACTLY the right amount of frosting to fill up your cookies, without running out and without having leftovers. Because I am awesome like that.

Makes about 18 cookie-sammiches.

(Cookie recipe posted at Splendid Sustenance, originally from Veganomicon)

Red Hot Mamas

I decided to bake some cookies last week, and I had a random cookie-recipe sitting at home that sounded good to me. I'd printed it out ages ago and stumbled across it while cleaning last week. The recipe was for chocolate peanut butter oatmeal cookies, or some such thing.

I was a bit thrown when I read the introductory blurb at the top of the recipe (which claimed that they were very popular cookies) and saw that the creator said they yielded only three really huge cookies (of tablespoon drop-cookie size), "just the way she liked them." I thought it a typo and assumed she meant three DOZEN (because who in god's name goes through the trouble of making dough for only three cookies??).

But I am stupid like that and, although I checked to make sure I had all the ingredients before I started putting the recipe together, I never checked the QUANTITIES, so when I hit the part of the recipe where I apparently was told to add only 2.5 Tablespoons of flour, I suddenly had a WTF moment. I have never in my life seen a cookie recipe calling for only 2.5 T. of flour. Again, being stupid, I assumed that they must've meant cups instead of tablespoons, and I commenced to adding 2.5 cups of flour.

Clearly it was not a typo for "cups," and it ended up turning into an enormous powdery mess.

I tried to rescue the recipe by adding soy milk, but the batter just turned into play-do consistency and didn't taste good at all.

I'm pretty certain there's no way that only 2.5 T. of flour would've made the cookies any better, but I guess I will never know what the typoed quantity should've been. End result: Me, dumping cookie dough very angrily into my garbage can.

Needless to say, once I figure out where that recipe came from, I AM HUNTING DOWN THE CREATOR AND RIPPING OFF ALL THEIR FINGERNAILS AND THEN KICKING THEM IN THE NIPPLES IN THE MOST PEACEFUL, GENTLE, CARING, VEGAN-LIKE, NON-VIOLENT MANNER POSSIBLE!

Oh yes. You have been warned, Shitty Cookie Lady.

Anyways, after getting severely pissed off and flopping down on the couch to stare at the television for about 10 minutes in an attempt to assuage my anger, I decided to try baking something else instead.

The problem was this (which is also why I was so pissed off at the Shitty Cookie Recipe):

- Right now I have no car.

- This means I have no means of easily running out to get any ingredients I need but don't have.

- This means I had been trying to whip up something with what I had in my cupboard, WHILE ALSO making sure that I had enough ingredients left over to make cookie-sandwiches I had been planning to make for my birthday.

So: after looking through like 1900 different cookbooks, I finally just found myself coming back to the ever-adaptable chocolate thumbprint cookies in VwaV. I'd adapted them once before with delightful results, so I decided (since I had all the ingredients on hand) that I'd try out a new take on them this time.

I'm a big fan of the chocolate-cinnamon-cayenne combo (see also the Mexican Chocolate Cake recipe I've raved about on prior occasion). I adore it, it enflames my passions, it makes me want to spread it all over my inner thighs and make people lick it off.

So I decided to experiment with some Mexican Chocolate Cookies.

I was pleased with the end result, although next time I think I will make some sort of spicy-chocolate drizzle to toss on top, just to add a bit more oomph. But even without it, these will definitely get you all fevered up and sweaty. *Waggling eyebrows at you*

INGREDIENTS:

Dry:


• 2 c. flour


• 2/3 c. cocoa


• 1/2 t. baking soda


• 1/4 t. salt


• 1/2 t. cinnamon


• Cayenne pepper to taste*


Wet:


• 1 1/3 c. sugar


• 2/3 c. soy milk


• 2/3 c. canola oil


• 2.5 t. vanilla



• 2/3 to 1 c. vegan semi-sweet chocolate chips

*I'd start off with 1/8 t. of cayenne, mix the wet and dry ingredients together (minus the choc chips), and then start adding more cayenne little by little until it's at a comfortable level of spiciness for your tastebuds. Just make sure that you mix the dough up well after each addition, otherwise you'll accidentally end up with a few FREAKING HOT cookies where the cayenne pepper accumulated.


DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven at 350. Mix the dry ingredients together in a large bowl. Mix the wet ingredients together in a separate bowl. Add the wet to the dry and mix until fully combined. Add in any added cayenne pepper at this point, until the heat-level has you all hot and bothered. Add the chocolate chips.

On a cookie sheet covered in wax/parchment paper, scoop out heaping tablespoon-sized amounts of dough. Smoosh down a slight bit once you drop them on the pan.

After you've filled the cookie sheet (they expand, so not too close to one another), toss into the oven for 10 minutes or so (until tops have started to crack).

Once you've removed them from the oven, let them cool in the pan for about five minutes, and then transfer to a cooling rack.

Makes about 24-30 cookies or so.

Snowballs & Snowboobies

So I, of course, had to bring you some final food erotica to ring in the New Year. It just wouldn't be right if I didn't.

As I mentioned a couple weeks ago, I had a little pre-Xmas shindig, prior to Xmas (duh). And for shits and giggles, I decided it just wouldn't be Xmas if my sugar cookies didn't include anatomically-correct snowmen and snowwomen.

So I busted out the cookie cutters, busted out the pseudo-rolling-pins (aka. beer bottles), and suckered my friend MC into helping out. Now, I've seen many a penis, but it's surprisingly hard (buddumm chiii) to fashion one on a snowman. So thankfully MC skillfully rolled and fashioned and fashioned and rolled several snowmen penii that were so delectably perfect that the snowwomen I'd created were having a hard (buddumm chii) time keeping their hands off of them. Very quickly, the kitchen was a-flutter with snowpenii, snowbajingos, snowballs, snowthreesomes, snowtwosomes, and even a snowonesome. It was *madness*.

Once we finally managed to split them all up, we thrust them into the oven to bake.

Thankfully, Pavlina's recipe is a good one. So the cookies ended up turning out real nice, peepees all intact.

And despite all his whining about "never having baked a cookie before" and his skillfully crafted air of indifference towards his creations, MC *did* end up nonchalantly inquiring a few days later about whether or not I was gonna end up posting pics of some of the cookies he made.

So post them I am (click on pics for the x-rated versions).

May I present to you, MC's c0ck & balls:


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INGREDIENTS:

Cookie Dough:

• 3/4 c. vegan margarine


• 1 c. vegan sugar


• Egg replacer for 2 eggs


• 1/4 t. pure vanilla extract


• 2.5 c. flour


• 1 t. salt


• 1 t. baking powder

Frosting:

• 3 T. margarine


• Dash of salt


• 1/2 t. vanilla


• 1.5 c. powdered sugar


• Nondairy milk



• Vegan sprinkles for decorating

DIRECTIONS

In a mixing bowl, cream margarine and sugar together. Blend in egg replacer and vanilla. Add sifted flour, salt, and baking powder. Combine to form a dough. Cover with plastic wrap and chill about 1-2 hours.

Preheat oven to 350° F.

Roll dough to desired thickness, approximately 1/8- to 1/4-inch thick, and use cookie cutters to form shapes.

Place cookies on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. Bake for 8-10 minutes or until just starting to brown. Cool on racks.

Once cookies are cooled, beat the frosting ingredients in a medium bowl until frosting is fluffy. Add enough milk to reach your desired frosting consistency. Spread frosting on cooled cookies. Decorate with sprinkles or colored sugar.

(recipe as posted by Erin Pavlina at MotheringDotCommune, originally found in her cookbook, Vegan Family Favorites)

VwaV Chocolate Chip Cookies

When I told my friend Mo recently that I've had INSANE cravings for sugar lately, she said "It's because you haven't gotten laid in a while. You just need to get laid, and problem solved."

Easy 'nuff.

But since *that* hasn't panned out quite yet, I instead spent last Friday baking just a wee bit shy of three dozen VwaV chocolate chip cookies, and then nearly plowed my way through all of them. By myself. I guess it's sort of the equivalent of cookie masturbation or something.

But damn--if this is what cookie-'bation tastes like, then 'bate me the hell up! Because these are some damn good, freakishly tasty, deliciously molassesey cookies.

And if you're not into the whole self-love thing (For shame! To quote Woody Allen: "Don't knock masturbation; it's sex with someone I love..."), then they *could* very well GET you laid. When I made these a couple weeks ago, I watched a boy plow through 10 of them within two hours. TEN of them.

Again: nuff said.

So my advice is this: If you haven't gotten laid lately, strip down to your skivvies (or to the skin-suit you were born in) and whip these babies up. They may not be as good as sex, but then again, they're not gonna roll over and fall asleep two minutes after you've done the deed.* And for that reason alone: priceless.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 c. vegan margarine, at room temp


• 1 1/4 c. sugar


• 1 T. molasses


• 2 t. vanilla extract


• 2 1/2 c. all-purpose flour


• 1 t. baking soda


• 1 t. salt


• 1 1/2 c. semi-sweet chocolate chips

DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 350 F.

Cream the margarine and sugar with a hand mixer (or by hand) until fluffy. Add the molasses and vanilla and incorporate.

Add the dry ingredients to this mixture and mix until a dough forms. Fold the chocolate chips into the dough.

Roll dough into 1 inch balls or drop by tablespoons onto ungreased cookie sheets.

Bake for 8 to 10 minutes until mildly browned. Allow the cookies to cool on the baking sheets for 5 minutes. Then transfer to cooling racks, cool and enjoy!

(As reposted at Recipezaar)


----------
* I must admit, I've never actually had a boy do this, so either it's a big fat stereotype or I'm just really really good in the sack. Perhaps a bit of both. Perhaps. A. Bit. Of. Both.

Snowballs (Aka. Mexican Wedding Cookies, Aka. Russian Tea Cakes)

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowgirl?

SNOWBALLS!

Think about THAT while you're letting these scrumptious and delicate snowballs melt in your mouth!

Mmmmm. Snowman testicles. Arghlghlhgl.



Stuffing your mouth full of these has never had such very odd implications before.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 c. vegan non-hydrogenated margarine


• 1/4 c. granulated sugar


• 2 t. vanilla


• 2 c. all-purpose flour, sifted


• 2 c. raw pecans, almonds, walnuts, or hazelnuts (I used a mix of the first three), finely chopped


• 2 c. powdered sugar, sifted

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 300F. Line a cookie sheet (or two) with parchment paper (or use non-stick ones).

Cream the vegan margarine, granulated sugar, and vanilla until light and fluffy, about 1-2 minutes. Add the flour, mixing until thoroughly combined. Add your nuts (hee hee), mixing until well-blended, about 30 seconds.

Measure out generously-rounded teaspoonfuls of dough, and roll into balls. Place about an inch apart on your sheet(s). Bake until they just begin to turn golden, about 30 minutes. To tes for doneness, remove one cookie from the sheet and cut in half. There should be no doughy strip in the center.

Roll cookies in the powdered sugar while they're still hot. Cool on baking sheets before serving.

Makes about 3-dozen snowman testicles.

(from VegNews, Nov/Dec. 2007, p. 76)

Why I Have No Badges

Because you know how once a year, they pack all the girl scouts into a giant sweatshop-type factory and force them to bake girl scout cookies until they're sobbing and sucking their thumbs and crying for their mommies, and 1/4 of those girls are sitting in the part of the factory line where their little fingers are drizzling the chocolatey lines delicately over the somoas, into nice little perfect little girl scouty chocolate drizzles, all so they can get their cookie badges? Well, yeah. I suck at drizzles. And apparently I suck at melted chocolate as well. My drizzles look like I dragged Picasso into my kitchen, blindfolded him, tied his right hand behind his back, and demanded that he MOTHERF-ING DRIZZLE OR I'M GONNA POP A MOTHERF-ING CAP IN HIS ASS. Hence, they are not petite and delicate, sweet little girl scouty lines. They are weird, fat, confused, riotous lines of crazy chocolate.

But hey, they taste good. So the girl scouts can just take their badges and shove 'em.

(Thanks, Bazu, for pointing this recipe out.)

VEGAN SOMOAS

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 1/2 c. rolled oats


• 1 3/4 c. white whole wheat flour (or whole wheat pastry)


• 1/4 t. sea salt


• 1 1/2 t. baking powder


• 1 c. shredded coconut


• 1/2 c. ground pecans


• 1/2 c. chopped pecans


• 1 c. brown rice syrup (or a combination of brown rice syrup and maple syrup/agave nectar)


• 1/2 cup extra virgin coconut oil (or vegetable oil works as well)

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Mix all ingredients, using your hands at the end if necessary.

Drop rounded spoonfuls onto lightly oiled baking sheet and bake for approximately 14 minutes.

Cool on a wire rack.

Since I haven't exactly mastered the chocolate part of this, all I'll say is that you need to melt some semi-sweet chocolate chips with some soy milk in your microwave to get melty chocolate that will solidify upon application. Coat the bottoms of your cookies with the chocolate and let them harden. Drizzle the chocolate in a girl-scouty (or Picasso-ish, depending) type way over the tops.

Veggie Voice's Tips:

• When working with coconut oil, be sure that all other ingredients are at room temperature or else you will get oil lumps. It may help to mix the oil with shredded coconut before adding other ingredients.


• Do not overmix! Your cookies will be very tough if you do. Mix until ingredients are just combined.


• Do not overbake! Your cookies will be hard as rocks. Brown rice syrup tends to make cookies crunchy, so be aware of this and proceed accordingly. Increase the proportion of maple syrup to create a chewier cookie or decrease baking time.

(Original recipe at The Veggie Voice)

Chocolate Peanut Butter Shells

I saw this recipe a couple weeks back, via the one and only Tania's blog, My Journey: Adventures of a Vegan, and I'd been fantasizing about it for weeks, and yet somehow not finding time to actually TRY the recipe out.

But lo and behold, on Sunday God created chocolatey-peanutbuttery goodness, and it was good.

I brought these into work on Monday, after trying to control myself so that I didn't eat a ridiculous amount of them Sunday night, and they went very quickly. E has concluded that these may be his new favorite cookies, and my boss came back for seconds about five minutes after FIRSTS and without even having to be encouraged to do so.

So yeah. Make these. They'll make your squishy little tumbly happy.


INGREDIENTS:

Dry:

• 1.5 c. flour


• 1/2 c. baking cocoa


• 1/2 t. baking soda

Wet:

• 1/2 c. margarine, softened


• 1/2 c. sugar


• 1/2 c. brown sugar, packed


• 1/4 c. soy milk


• 1 t. vanilla

Peanut Butter Filling:

• 1/2 c. sifted powdered sugar


• 1/2-3/4 c. peanut butter- chunky is great!


• 1/3 cup chocolate chips

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 350. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper.

In a small bowl, sift together the flour, cocoa powder and baking soda. In a large bowl beat together margarine, sugar, brown sugar. Add milk. Beat well. Gently mix in the flour mixture about 1/3 at a time until incorporated.

For the filling, combine powdered sugar and peanut butter in a mixing bowl and beat until sugar is absorbed and peanut butter feels stiffer. Add chocolate chips. It should be a pretty solid mixture because you want to form it into little balls. If it’s still oily or thin, add a little more powdered sugar.

Using a piece of dough just a bit smaller than the size of a golf ball, flatten the dough into a disc on a piece of parchment paper. Place a heaping teaspoon of the peanut butter mixture on the center of the dough. Carefully fold chocolate dough over the peanut butter ball and seal the edges. Roll dough into a ball. If the dough gets dry, add a splash of milk to moisten it.

Place balls on baking sheet, seam down, about 1 inch apart. Bake for about 8-10 minutes, until the surface begins to slightly crack. Let cool for 2 minutes on the sheet then transfer to cooling rack.

Makes about 2 dozen.

*The dough should be similar in texture and malleability to Play-doh.

(from Squirrel's Vegan Kitchen)

The Brownies of Death and the Cookies of Life

THE BROWNIES OF DEATH
Apparently I horrified some of you (as well as myself) last week when posting E's garlic bread recipe which appeared to use a whole cup of vegan butter. Needless to say, he didn't actually *use* all the butter on the garlic loaf. (Thanks be to Jesus.)

Anyways, I was even *MORE* horrified this weekend when I tried out a peanut-butter brownie recipe from the Vegan Planet cookbook, *AND IT WAS EVEN GREASIER THAN THE GARLIC BREAD WE HAD*. I'm sorry to say, brownies shouldn't even come CLOSE to being comparable to garlic bread grease-factor-wise. And yet, these brownies totally totally were.

In fact, right now, these brownies are sitting on the corner of my desk at work, shamefully hiding themselves from being seen because they *REALIZE* they are ridiculously greasy and are embarassed about it.

Seriously.

Can you say, Blorf?

I can. And it's precisely what I said to myself when, after the brownies had cooled all the way, I sliced them up and began to remove them from my (kick-ass silicon) brownie-pan. The bottom of the pan was shiny like the face of a greasy and pimplified teenager. I held up a brownie to inspect it, and the bottom was about three times darker than the top due to the oil. I promptly placed all the brownies on napkins to absorb some of the oil, but that helped only minimally. When I scrounged up enough nerve to try one again this morning, to see if I might actually be able to offer them to folks, it was like sucking on a large pad of chocolatey-looking butter. I ate the whole brownie (because I am an idiot like that), but that was that. Now I'm just prolonging the inevitable trip to the trashcan.

What went wrong? I've not a clue. I used the precise amounts the recipe called for. And yet, it was a grease-fest like no other grease-fest I've ever seen.

I think I'm swearing off brownies for a while because of it.

Point being: unless someone out there has *had* good results with these brownies and wants to help me figure out what I did wrong, I suggest the rest of you stear clear. Your arteries will thank you.

THE COOKIES OF LIFE



Sadly, I was attempting these brownies for a friend's birthday, but once I saw the slimy sheen glistening across the bottoms of them, I couldn't rightfully give them to her. Especially since she's getting ancient (she turned 30) and I didn't want to encourage a heart attack. (BURNNNN!) But thankfully, I accidentally found wedged in a textbook of mine, an assortment of dessert recipes that E had photocopied for me. Realizing that I was quickly running short on a) soy milk, b) vanilla extract, c) vegan butter, and d) canola oil, I thanked my lucky stars that this recipe called for PRECISELY the amount of a), b) and c) that I had on hand.

And damn if these aren't good cookies. I added a couple tablespoons of orange zest to them as well because I was in the mood to orangify, and I highly recommend them that way. The only thing the recipe failed to mention (and which is necessary) is that you need to let the cookies harden on the baking sheet for at least 3 minutes or so before you transfer them to a rack. Otherwise, when you go to pick them up, they're just gonna turn to mush in your fingers. I also recommend using a temperature of 375 and baking for 10 minutes. 10 minutes at 350 was turning up barely-browned cookies, but (as always) it could just be my stove. So just keep your eye on them.

INGREDIENTS:

• 1 c. softened vegan (non-hydrogenated) margarine


• 1/2 c. vegan brown sugar


• 1/2 c. vegan sugar


• 1/4 c. soy milk


• 1 t. vanilla


• 2-1/4 c. flour


• 1/2 t. salt


• 1 t. baking soda


• 12 oz. semi-sweet vegan chocolate chips


• 2 T. orange zest

DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 375 F.

In a large bowl, mix the margarine, sugar, and brown sugar until it's light and fluffy. Slowly stir in the soy milk then add the vanilla to make a creamy mixture.

In a separate bowl, combine the flour, salt, and baking soda. Add this dry mixture to the creamy mixture and stir well. Then fold in the chocolate chips.

Drop small spoonfuls onto non-stick cookie sheets and bake for 8-10 minutes (or until tops are lightly golden).

Remove from oven and let the cookies sit on the baking sheet for at least 3 minutes until firm. Place on cooling rack to cool completely.

(Adapted from the COK Kitchen)

Anti-Valentine's Day Cookies

Minus the little-kiddy Valentine's Day cards which remind me of being a wee one, I am not a fan of Valentine's Day. Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of love. And I'm a fan of good-lovin'. But I'm not so much a fan of Hallmark and giant obligatory boxes of chocolates to demonstrate one's love.

So needless to say, I AM a big fan of Be My Anti-Valentine, a site I turn to every V-day for a few good chuckles. (I was going to post all this yesterday, but for those of you who don't live in Cleveland and didn't realize there's such a thing as snow, I was pretty much snowed-in for the day with nowhere to internet. You can appreciate the snow vicariously if you'd like by checking out some of my pics HERE.) This post won't do you much good this year since today is just V-day aftermath, but then again, maybe some of you can use and appreciate the link next year, now that you know about it.

Anyways, because of the aforementioned snow, I actually had off Tuesday night, so I decided (because I am cracked out sometimes and like to do the wrong things in inclement weather) to pick up food-coloring and make some anti-valentines day cookies. I originally wanted to make ones that said FUCK HALLMARK, but then I realized I couldn't really bring them into work. So instead, I decided to make these anatomical heart cookies. Cuz hearts are meant to be gross and slimy and pump blood, not be glittery and skanked out with lace. So there!

These aren't the best-tasting cookies, mostly because I wasn't even sure how long to cook them as they were kind of odd-shaped and whatnot. But at least they're cute--the way that really nappy dog down the street with only two teeth is kinda cute.

BEFORE...



AFTER...




INGREDIENTS

• 3/4 c. vegan margarine, softened


• 1 c. sugar or granulated sweetener


• 2 egg replacer eggs, prepared


• 1/4 t. vanilla


• 3-5 drops peppermint extract (more or less to taste)


• 2 1/2 c. flour


• 1 t. baking powder


• 1 t. salt


• 14 drops or so of red food-coloring


• 14 drops or so of blue food-coloring

DIRECTIONS
Whisk the first five ingredients together until well-blended. In a second bowl, mix together the remaining ingredients, minus the food-coloring. Add the wet ingredients to the dry and mix and knead until all blended together. Split into two halves. Add the red food coloring to one and the blue to another. Knead each until the food-coloring is well-blended. Refrigerate for 2 hours or so.

Preheat oven to 350. Shape cookies into anatomical hearts (this is where you have to use your own damn imagination, people, cuz I ain't really got no tips). Place on cookie sheet covered in parchment paper. Bake 15 minutes or so. Remove. Confusedly try to figure out if they are done or not. Realize after a few minutes that they aren't. Panic and place them back in the oven for an undetermined amount of minutes (about 3-5). Remove and realize you're not quite sure whether they're ever gonna cook the whole way and that you can't really taste-test them enough to make sure since you only baked 8. Sigh.

Makes about 12 cookies (unless you're lazy like me and just give up after 8)

With These Shoulder Pads I Have the Strength to Destroy Villages, Homes and Crops

As you all know, I rarely post recipes from cookbooks on my blog, out of respect to the folks kind enough to compile and publish collections of their fantastic vegan recipes, but today I'm posting one from the most recent issue of the Vegetarian Times. And the reason that I'm doing so is that I have mixed feelings about the magazine--while I appreciate the fact that they go out of their way to publish and designate vegan recipes, I take issue with the other ways in which it handles veganism within its pages. So in publishing their vegan recipes on the rare occasions that I do, I consider it my own tiny little act of protest. So there, Vegetarian Times! Take that! Wappah! *Karate chop*

Anyways, these cookies are fricking amazing. E tried one out the other day and immediately came back with a "best cookie ever" response and the command that I make them again for him. Right then and there. So he may eat them forever and ever. So yeah, he'd probably second the recommendation.

The cookies are called Ginger Gems, but of course when I realized that, I immediately got the song "Gem Sweater" by Leslie and the Lys stuck in my head (you can watch their gloriously campy and bizarre and fricking funny video HERE if you haven't been blessed enough to already have seen it)... So consequently I've taken to calling them "Junior Jems" instead. But you can call them whatever you damn well please, of course.

These cookies are very simple to make, *AND* they're glazed (which just fricking rocks because ANYTHING is just automatically cooler when it's glazed). The only two problems I had with the recipe (and they're minimal ones) were that a) for some reason the VT didn't feel the need to put the 1/4 c. of water in the ingredients list (which I have, so that you may avoid the same confusion as me), so I managed to gloss over the inclusion of water when I put together the cookie dough. Needless to say, I was a bit freaked out when the cookie dough was super-crumbly and not compactible at all. Then I noticed the water in the directions themselves (VT, last time I checked, water *IS* an ingredient--just so you know) and added it last minute--thankfully it didn't cause any problems. However, it'd still be useful for you to know (if you end up baking these) that the dough is very thick, despite the fact that they consider them "drop" cookies. Drop cookies implies to me a bit of mushiness, enough so that the dough will goopily drop off the spoon onto the pan. But these you kinda have to press into a flattened shape to make. So word to the wise. And b) as always, the ingredients for the glaze seemed like it would make enough to glaze a small Volkswagon, so I decided to half it (which are the quantities you see here). I don't know why recipes generally super-overcompensate when it comes to frosting and glaze, but in my past experience, every frosting and glaze recipe I've stumbled across has left me with gratuitous unusable left-over quantities. So word to the wise--you'll be better off starting with the quantities below--they should make more than enough to glaze your cookies, but if not, you can just make more.



INGREDIENTS:

• 3/4 c. sugar


• 1/4 c. vegan margarine, softened


• 1/4 c. vegetable oil


• 1/4 c. crystallized ginger, finely chopped


• 1 T. molasses


• 1 T. vanilla extract


• 1/4 c. water


• 2 c. whole wheat flour


• 1 t. baking soda


• 1/2 t. salt


• 1 c. finely chopped walnuts

GLAZE INGREDIENTS:

• 2 1/4 T. lime juice


• 1.5 c. powdered sugar

DIRECTIONS

Preheat oven to 375. In a large mixing bowl, mix together the sugar, margarine, oil, molasses, and vanilla. Once this is mixed, add in the water and ginger and mix until absorbed. In a separate bowl, mix together the flour, baking soda, and salt. Add your dry ingredients to your wet and mix until completely combined. Cut in the chopped walnuts.

On either a greased pan or parchment paper, begin to spoon out your cookies about 1 inch apart or so. Use about a spoon's worth of dough for each cookie--it's too thick to actually kinda "drop" on the pan, so you may just wanna smoosh together about a spoon's worth and then flatten it out a tiny bit on the pan.

Bake for 10-12 minutes. Let cool for 3 minutes before removing from the pan. Place on a cooling rack until completely cooled.

For the glaze, whisk your lime juice into your powdered sugar. Dip the top of each completely-cooled cookie into the glaze and return the cookies to the cooling rack until the glaze hardens.

Eat while singing "Gem Sweater" and busting some cool-ass gem-sweatery moves on your kitchen floor.

Say what? Say what?

Makes 35 cookies.

(recipe from the November/December Issue of the Vegetarian Times (p. 80))

Bloody Finger Cookies

THE PREPARATION



THE RESULTS



These have always been my favorite cookies to bake--they are way too much fun to shape and gorify, almost better than pumpkin-carving when it comes to entertaining gruesomeness. And people love them--they are initially grossed out, but then they taste them and can't stop eating them. Despite the grossness of them, they are rich and delicate little almond cookies. And they came out just as lovely-tasting veganized, perhaps even BETTER-tasting than the original recipe (they tasted more luxuriant and crispier to me). They were the definite favorite of Saturday night's party.

Ingredients:

• 1 c. vegan margarine (I use the Earth Balance tub that says it's good for baking on it), softened


• 1 c. vegan powdered sugar


• 1.5 t. of Ener G egg replacer mixed with 2 T. warm water (equivalent of one egg)


• 1 t. almond extract


• 1 t. vanilla extract


• 2 2/3 c. flour


• 1 t. baking powder


• 1/2 t. salt


• 3/4 c. whole blanched almonds (or you can blanch them yourself if you can only find ones with skin)


• 1 tube red decorating gel (make sure it's vegan, but i didn't have any problems finding a tube)

Directions:
In a mixing bowl, beat together butter, sugar, EnerG egg replacer/water mix, almond extract and vanilla; beat in the flour, baking powder and salt. Refrigerate covered for 30 minutes. Preheat oven to 325F. Take one quarter of dough at a time from the refrigerator. Break off one heaping teaspoonful and roll it into a finger shape. Press an almond firmly into one end for a nail. Squeeze in around the middle of the finger to create a knuckle shape. Using a butter knife, make indents in several places to resemble a finger. Repeat with rest of dough.

Place cookies on a lightly greased baking sheet (or parchment paper) and bake for 25 minutes (or until a golden brown on the bottom). Let cool three minutes. Gently lift up the almond; squeeze red decorating gel onto the nailbed and press the almond back in place, so gel oozes out from underneath. Add in red gel at the stump end of the fingertip if there's a bit of a cave. Remove cookies from baking sheets and let them cool on wire racks.

TIPS:

Make your fingers thin. They plump up and sink down as they bake.

Make a small indentation into the end of the finger where it would've been severed from the hand. You can later squish some red gell in there to make it look like a bloody stump.

Makes about 2-dozen cookies

Pumpkin Oatmeal Cookies

Finally! Finally we get to my favorite thing that I made all week: the Vegan with a Vengeance pumpkin oatmeal cookies. These things are so fricking good that they make you want to run around your office floor while singing operatic music at the top of your lungs and leaping joyously like a ballerina, they make violins want to swell ecstatically, they make birds want to alight on your shoulders and beams of sunlight break through the clouds to beam down on you and you only, they make you want to howl orgasmically and make all the prudes' faces turn beet-red, they make you wanna stop in the middle of the street and start break-dancing or doing the robot, they make you want to make sweet sweet love to them. That's how good they are.

Seriously though, when I brought them into work, I described them as tasting "like you're chewing on a nice big squishy wad of autumn." And that's precisely what they taste like, all warm and yummy with the scents of pumpkin and cinnamon and nutmeg. Good good stuff. And everyone who tried them loved them as well. I even had one person randomly mutter to me as I was leaving the other day, "Man, this day somehow just isn't as good without pumpkin cookies." And it's true--if every day were a pumpkin-oatmeal cookie day, the world would be a much better place.

INGREDIENTS

• 2 c. flour


• 1 1/3 c. rolled oats


• 1 t. baking soda


• 3/4 t. salt


• 1 t. cinnamon


• 1/2 t. nutmeg



• 1 2/3 c. sugar


• 2/3 c. canola oil


• 2 T. molasses


• 1 c. canned pumpkin, or cooked pureed pumpkin


• 1 t. vanilla


• optional: 1 T ground flax seeds



• 1 c. walnuts, finely chopped


• 1/2 c. raisins

Directions
Preheat oven to 350. Have ready 2 greased baking sheets.

Mix together flour, oats, baking soda, salt and spices.

In a seperate bowl, mix together sugar, oil, molasses, pumpkin and vanilla (and flax seeds if using) until very well combined. Add dry ingredients to wet in 3 batches, folding to combine. Fold in walnuts and raisins.

Drop by tablespoons onto greased cookie sheets. They don't spread very much so they can be placed only an inch apart. Flatten the tops of the cookies with a fork or with your fingers, to press into cookie shape. Bake for 16 minutes at 350. If you are using two sheets of cookies on 2 levels of your oven, rotate the sheets halfway through for even baking. You'll have enough batter for 4 trays.

Remove from oven and get cookies onto a wire rack to cool. These taste best when they've had some time to cool and set. They taste even better the next day!

from the PPK

Orange You Glad They're Double Chocolate Cookies?

So I never quite know the etiquette of reposting recipes here, but to be kind to those who take the time to make us recipe-books (and to steer clear from being sued), I typically don't repost book-recipes here (unless I'm able to find them on-line somewhere). That being said, today's cookie-recipe was inspired by the Chocolate Thumbprint Cookie recipe from Vegan with a Vengeance but is far enough removed from its original form that I feel alright publishing it here. (If anyone objects--bring it! We will have a full-on cookie war.)

That being said, MOTHER OF GOD did these cookies come out tasty. Squishy and decadently chocolatey with a powerful hint of orange akin to those Flintstones push-up popsicles from my youth.

And as raw-dough consumption goes, this shit is MANNA.

INGREDIENTS

Dry:
1 c. flour
1/3 c. cocoa
1/4 t. baking soda
1/4 t. salt

Wet:
2/3 c. sugar
1/3 c. soy milk
1/3 c. canola oil
1 t. vanilla
1/2 t. almond extract
2 t. orange zest

1/4-1/3 c. vegan semi-sweet chocolate chips

DO:

Preheat oven at 350. Mix the dry ingredients together in a large bowl. Mix the wet ingredients together in a separate bowl. Add the wet to the dry and mix until fully combined. And the chocolate chips.

On a cookie sheet covered in wax/parchment paper, scoop out heaping tablespoon-sized amounts of dough. This dough is very very sticky, so you will probably have to wet your hands before handling it until they start to gum up and then rewet again, etc. Take the tablespoon-sized dough-goop and smoosh it between your hands until slightly flattened. Place on sheet.

After you've filled the cookie sheet (they expand, so not too close to one another), toss into the oven for 11 minutes.

Once you've taken them out, top with orange-peel for decoration if you so choose. Let sit in the pan for a few minutes and then, leaving cookies on the wax paper, remove to a rack. Let cool all the way before handling them, as they will be super-soft.

Said one satisfied consumer: "not that i want to compliment you. but your smooshy cookie was actually good."

The End.

VERDICT: A

Vegan Chocolate Chip Oatmeal Nut Cookies

Yeah, so the baking-ban was short-lived, though only out of necessity really--it's another coworker's b-day today, and she always makes sure to bring me in a little sumthin'-sumthin' on my b-day (that sounds way dirtier than I'd intended--or even would ever WANT it--to be), and since she loves when I bring in bakery, I figured I'd whip her up some cookies. Thankfully the break in the baking-boycott was a successful one, otherwise I might've seriously become bitter against all things egg-replacer and vanilla extract.

I am cheap and didn't feel like running out to the grocery store and buying vegan baking "butter" (it's fricking $3.49 at my grocery store), so I managed to track down *this* recipe, which made me happy since I had nearly all of the ingredients at home already.

These are a cinch to make, and as one of the reviewers on the recipe page stated, they have quite a bit of "fluff" to them, which is for the most part a-typical when it comes to vegan cookies. They are subtly sweet and both crunchy (walnuts) and chewy (glorious glorious cookie dough), and I had to exert some MAJOR self-control yesterday to not consume the majority of them and leave my coworker with a measly two cookies sitting lonesomely in a dish. I recommend.

RECIPE: Here

VERDICT: A

The Best Chocolate Chip Vegan Cookies EVER!

This is, most definitely, the *best* vegan cookie recipe I've stumbled across so far, and I had my doubts, given that they were self-named the "Best Chocolate Chip Vegan Cookies EVER!" It's hard not to be skeptical when a cookie is just so goddamn boastful.

Anyways, they are very simple to make. They are ooey gooey, rich, and scrumptious. And the raw dough is fricking addictive. Holy mother of god. It was like a tractor beam kept pulling me back to the mixing bowl. The only alteration I made to the recipe was to use soy milk instead of water--I figured it'd make them taste just a wee bit richer.

I highly recommend this recipe, especially if you want to make folks go, "Oh my god, these are *VEGAN*?!?!"

One Russian taste-tester said (squinting suspiciously at his second cookie before eating it):

"They don't look pretty, but they taste really good."

I thought they were kinda photogenic (see above pic) with a waif-like model-esque beauty akin to that of Kate Moss. But clearly that's just me.

RECIPE: HERE

VERDICT: A

Banana Sunflower Seed Cookies

Recipe: HERE

Verdict: A

Comments: Squishy nuttiness and nannery goodness.